Welcome to Las Vegas. Hide your wallet! They’ll steal anything here. You’ll lose more things from being robbed, than from gambling. In 8 months someone has stolen clothes detergent, a grocery bag, and an umbrella out of my apartment. This town can’t help itself. It’s compulsion. Stealing is such a way of life here, I wouldn’t put it past a guy to use his dick as a ploy to steal my fabulous girl bits.
Being a woman and a writer I mentally document everything. I even know exactly how many pairs of socks I own (it’s a lot!) I keep a mental inventory of everything I own. When something gets moved around, I know it instantly. It’s usually a roommate’s nut job girlfriend, or maintenance men. Hey, I watch Forensic Files. I’m onto you guys.
Sure I could put cameras all over my apartment but why? Like I’m going to take someone to court over an umbrella?
Unlike Los Angeles, it’s not just the garden variety crazies and severely mentally disturbed, in Vegas it’s also semi-sober, semi-intelligent criminals you have to look out for.
Keep only “stunt” items around if you live here. Cherish nothing. You’re not going to have it for long. Just know there’s probably an 80% chance your Uber driver has served time in jail. I’m almost positive I was in a ride-share with a guy who had a corpse in the trunk of his car it stunk so bad. Either that or he was coming down from a two week bender and forgot to shower first. And let’s not forget the new ride-share trend of drivers secretly video taping your rides. According to outdated privacy laws, apparently it’s legal if just one passenger on camera says it’s ok at any given time for your driver to tape his passengers. Messed up.
But its still cheaper to live in Vegas than California. Just be sure to live (at least) ten miles in every direction away from the strip. I wish someone would have told me that. I live right by the strip and it’s ghetto. China Town is ok but it’s totally shady. Damn Asians.
Honestly the only difference between criminals here, and the criminals in LA, is that here they really don’t give a fuck what they look and smell like. Not one fuck given. Not one.
People who steal are degenerates. I know they say that about gamblers and drinkers but thieves are worse than dope dealers, only because dope, gambling and drinking can’t happen without the patron’s will. Being robbed is like being raped, it’s socialism. You have it. I want it. Therefor I’m taking it. Socialism. — Don’t forget to steal from all those limousine liberal hypocrites too.
Vegas is my Palm Springs gateway. Being single, no children, both my parents dead, I have to build some kind of old lady network. I moved to Vegas the same way I moved to Los Angeles in 1992, by myself not knowing a single person. It’s the same way I’ll move to Palm Springs, on my own. It’s the same way I’ve learned to do all things, by myself.
I have three days off, but work has been so completely nuts’o I’m physically worn down. Exhausted. Plus I’m losing my voice. I’m spending today on the couch, eating soup, looking for apartments, gargling warm salt water, and sleeping.
I wish I had a book to read. I’ve been reading books on my phone but miss reading an actual book. Not a whole lot of libraries and bookstores out here. Not exactly a town of readers.
Women who don’t read are irritating to be around. I’ve gotten pretty good at spotting non-readers, both foreign and domestic.
EXAMPLE: Two young French girls, both in their 20’s, thought the best way to pay a $16 bill, was for the first girl to hand the cashier $14 in singles, while the second girl also handed the cashier a $20 bill. The girls devised a plan to combine their sum of $34 for a $16 bill. See where this is going? So the cashier says to the girl with the singles, “Why don’t you give your friend $8, and your friend just give me the $20 bill, and I’ll give your friend the change?” But this makes zero sense to the French girls who insist their way is better, giving the cashier $34 between the two of them for a $16 check, all while screaming at the top of their lungs in broken English how right they are.
So either these girls don’t understand American money, or they don’t understand basic math, or they’re just stupid at life in general.
Seriously ladies, both foreign and domestic, can’t one of you pay a $16 check, and the next time you go out the other person pays? C’mon girls, you’re buying your friend two cocktails, not a brand new Lexus.
The problem here is, you can only try reasoning with people until you quickly see your efforts are moot, and then we’re forced to let these people stupidly ding-ding through the country at random.
Democrats for socialism would rather see human beings enslaved in equality, rather than recognize people as individuals with a right to freedom, stupid as fuck they may be.
But
I don’t worry about Democrats and their idiotic idea of socialism.
First of all,
No Republican, no conservative, no independent, will vote for socialism. Being a capitalist country is what inspires American business to start and thrive. Without capitalism there are no jobs, or even incentive to create jobs. It’s obvious Democrats for socialism want foreign power to take over this country. That’s what they’re really saying. Because that’s what would happen. No American will vote for that.
Second,
Two women. One woman has money. The other does not. The woman who does not have money tells the woman who does, “Socialism. What’s yours is mine.” Aaaaand then we all know what happens next, don’t we. Purge! We’re talking about women, a gender of people who won’t even buy each other two drinks and an appetizer.
How many times have you and your friends split a check?
Socialism! The one with the most money now pays.
Hear that feminists, if you earn more money than the men you hate, what’s yours is his. You’re paying.
This reminds me of a loaner husband I met once who was such a disgrace...
There’s a scene in ‘The Joy Luck Club’ where a couple is out on a date. She eats a $10 salad, he has a $30 steak (or something like that) and he allows her to split the check in half. That was this loaner husband. He was such a disgrace. And he blew up my phone every day afterwards. I had to block him. He was on sex websites to meet women who could buy him things. Married guy. What a disgrace of an educated man. Guys like him would vote for socialism preying on women like a piranha. I’m glad he told me who his friends are so I didn’t waste my time when they wrote me too.
Americans love independence.
We love our freedom.
We love our money!
We definitely do not like people telling us what to do, on home soil, especially behind closed doors.
PREDICTION: The moment Democrats try implementing socialism in American society, is when every fist raised in the air will have either a gun or a copy of the constitution.
No one liked Obamacare. No one. Not even Democrats. Because no one liked being penalized almost $700 in taxes for other people’s kids and families.
Socialist Democrats will use socialism as a gateway to communism. It’s why they love North Korea so much. But it will never work. You would have to literally “Manchurian” the entire country to buy into the farce of a Robin Hood republic, a country that will split check 6 ways from Sunday before buying their friends a basket of cheese sticks.
Moving on...
Regardless of how cool he is on Criminal Minds, and all his other works, Joe Mantegna will always be Fat Tony, to me.
It’s the same with Jon Hamm, I would eagerly hop in Jon’s lap in a heartbeat if given the opportunity regardless if he was wearing coffee stained sweats and sporting a 3 day beard, he’s still Don Draper, smoking hot and sexy. First and last impressions are fleeting and momentary, but unyielding impress lasts forever regardless how it arrives.
Hard workers will always be hard workers.
Lazy fucks will always be lazy fucks.
I will always want to bone Channing Tatum after seeing him dance in Magic Mike.
Whatever trips your trigger, gets in your head, that’s the thing that will matter.
It’s why Rick and I always saw each other as the girl and boy next door. Even though Rick grew into a fine and handsome man, to me he will always be the boy next door. That is how I will always remember and cherish him.
Like C. Simone.
Like E. Gordon.
Wherever I may roam, my head and heart I keep in the old neighborhood.
Leaving home was the worst thing I could have done for my love life, but sometimes you gotta go.
This for that.
Journey or destination?
I’m going to end this blog by saying one more thing addressing Trevor Noah...
You’re a comic. I get that. I’m a writer. We both on occasion say things that mean nothing more to us than material in the works, but to others it triggers them, and they have that right to be offended. Just as we have a right to offend them. Sticks and stones. Basic 1st grade coping skills. Nonetheless, the craft of our art is to be entertaining, engaging, and at the very least thought provoking. Not just insulting. Anyone can be just insulting. How boring.
We’re not horribly different, you and I. You’re an artist, a colored person, with roots from another country on another continent, with an English accent, named Trevor, now in the US, a minority, who is relatively intelligent with a disposition for American politics. See where I’m going with this?
Withal there are differences LIKE you’re not from here. I am. This is my country. I’m a patriot. For better or worse, I love my country. And if there’s one solid irritation I have with people who are not from here but still criticize my country and patriotic countrymen, it’s foreign raised people (particularly English people! You know who you are!) who think they know what’s best for America and it’s citizens. Yes, America is a land of immigrants, but there were indigenous people here first, everyone conveniently forgets about.
Respect the people, laws, and land of any country. — Especially you guys, Piers Morgan, Jon Oliver, and Lilo and Stitch or whatever the hell your Youtube names are, English irritating sons of bitches!
What was I talking about?
Oh
Right
Respect
I can relate with non-Americans on the surface but I would never have the audacity to go beyond that regardless if we have the same skin color. Hitler had the audacity and look how well that turned out.
Just stop. Take a step back and breathe. Your joke didn’t bother Aboriginal women back in 2013 like it does now because you’ve kinda sorta been all batshit crazy lately with the social media.
It’s just soccer, man! Your team will win next year.
Or not.
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