Sooooo what happened was...

My coworker speaks English, but he sometimes mumbles or talks too fast and I can't understand him. In response I'll (jokingly) say, "In English?" And apparently "In English?" Is a racist thing to say because my coworker isn't white.

Ok.

Um.

Two thing.

1. I don't know if you guys have noticed, but I'm not white either. Not entirely. Mostly not white. Obviously Asian. If you say to me, "In English?" I'm going to simply assume you didn't understand me, and repeat myself more clearly, followed with an oh-so-witty comeback.

2. Your not wanting me to say "In English" because my coworker isn't white, is in itself kind of a racist thing to say! Not all white people speak English. 

But fine. I won't say that anymore. I apologize. 

P.S. I'm not sure punching me was the appropriate response. But I'll let it pass because you hit like a 5 year old girl!

And another thing!

Remember when Alex said you looked white. You got offended! RACIST!! 

I was really hoping not to be called a racist this year. You guys called me a racist (some) 50 times last year. But in my defense, last year you guys called me a racist because I've never had sex with a black guy. I've never had sex with a Pacific Islander guy either but I'm a racist in your eyes ONLY for never having sex with black men. I challenged my accusers with a counter accusation of "conditional racism" especially since my accusers weren't even black men, but rather white women!

If you (the reader) can't see the humor in all this racial divide, WAIT it gets better!

So there's this artist of Latino descent...

I'm a huge fan of his work! Huge! I still am. However the current presidential election has turned him into a giant insane crazy person! He gets into rant-mode and just bashes Senators Ted Cruz and Mark Rubio, for not being "Latino enough" and he'll do this FOR HOURS, and hours, and hours. Jesus Christ! You could leave the room, spend 5 hours at the beach, come back, and he's still going!

I understand (to a point) when people remark "so-and-so is not (ethnic) enough" I'm accused of it all the time. I'm not Korean-enough. I shouldn't make fun of Asian people. Etc. YOU DO REALIZE I'm just trying to lighten the mood. That's all. 

Racism, serious business. Presidential election, again serious business. I would never with full intended heart randomly and purposely hurt people. BUT...

Some of you just beat things into the ground until (it seems) you're almost begging someone to poke a little fun at you. 

Hi! 

And another thing!

This whole #Apple war... 

Before you grab your guns and start shooting people, understand what the government is asking Apple to do. I'm not mentioning this because I have an iPhone, I'm bringing it up because Apple, as the government loves to remind us, is a product. Agreed. Apple sells products. We, the consumer, buy Apple products. But this our CHOICE and our right to spend our money on whatever products we want WITHOUT the government seizing control over our products and privacy. 

Do you really think the government would only use the encryption program "just on" suspected terrorism? 

"Terrorism. San Bernardino." And these are the only three words the government needs to say to get people riled up... particularly during election time. 

(Isn't terrorism why you have a barricade of guns stashed in every room of your house? Why do YOU need encryption software? You got guns!!) 

If this encryption software got into the hands (of anyone) imagine the profiling that would follow. We have rights. You don't get free access to my products, my life, because it would make your job "easier".

And what happens if this encryption software got into the wrong hands? 

Facebook. Twitter. Snapchat... I don't oppose the government reading timelines. 

Just...

Stay the hell off my phone. Perverts.