Over the years you've heard me complain about looking like a kid, never aging like the rest of the world. And while most people don't understand how frustrating it is, or think looking young forever would be wonderful, allow me to once again assure you it is not. You're almost entirely alone. Mostly, I don't understand why so many 50+ look like absolute shit. Fat. Disheveled. Outdated. What the fuck happened to you? Are we supposed to look that bad at 50? Did you quit? Why?
So many people nowadays look just awful by the time they turn 50, that whenever I see someone who looks great at 50, I'm like oh, you suffer from the John Mulaney syndrome, also. Because that dude looks like he's in his freshman year of college still and he's almost 40. He's going to look young forever. Kid Gorgeous. He's a comic so he'll make jokes about it, but in time it'll gnaw away at him on the inside. Trust me.
I've been asked if I might want to get back into modeling. Any product I modeled now would be such a lie. Sorry no, I look like this even without the anti age cream or foundation I'm peddling. Fuck you multi million dollar corporation. Sell your own lies.
This kills me. Someone in Japan made a doll, check it out. Click the link.
Finally a doll I can relate to
Damn I look good. Where's my equal? No. Fuck that. The question here fellas is. Why don't you look as good as me?
Well, why don't you?
At least I'm not getting carded anymore.
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