Plaid Skirt Torpedoes! : No for the 1,000th time

Monday, December 11, 2017

No for the 1,000th time

Hair product company (HPC) : "Are you willing to get your hair colored?"

Me: "No. Sorry. Cut only."

HPC: "We require our models to be open to having their hair both cut and colored."

Me: "I see. The questionnaire asked WHICH of the two procedures would I be available for, cut, or color, or both? I replied "cut only".

HPC: "You could get rid of that grey hair..."

Me: "I don't want to get rid of it."

HPC: "You want to keep your grey hair?"

Me: "Yes."

HPC: "Why?"

Me: "I like it."

HPC: "Why?"

Not that it's any of your business but I earned this grey hair. I like it. It's my natural hair color. 100% healthy. Thick. Vibrant. I barely use shampoo or conditioner and it doesn't fall out anymore.

HPC: "A lot of our products are for salon styled hair."

Me: "I get that. You don't have products for grey hair, or natural hair color?"

HPC: "We do but...."

Yeah yeah I know, women don't usually buy expensive salon products for natural hair color. We don't need to. I use Tresemme shampoo. Barely. One bottle lasts me a month. Sometimes longer. I hardly use conditioner. I don't use hairspray I live in Vegas. Before that Venice. My hair is extremely thick. Natural hair stays cleaner longer and it doesn't require a lot of shampoo. I blow out my hair once every 2 or 3 days. I get my hair cut once every 6-8 weeks, and blown.

Me: "I'm sorry. I answered your questionnaire honestly. I'm not interested getting my hair colored. It took two years to grow this out. I like it this way. I don't know what to tell you. Maybe change your questionnaire?"

HPC: "I'm disappointed. If you change your mind..."

Thanks. No. I won't.

Not ALL women keep dying their hair after 50 years of age. I'm turning 49 next month. Close enough. Women my age are dealing with other shit. Perimenopause. That's fun. Menopause. I can't even get a hysterectomy without a medical condition. I don't have a medical condition so YAY continued menstrual cycle. Don't be jealous! AARP. Life insurance. Senior care. Retirement. Death. It's not so much a treat anymore getting your roots colored every 3 to 4 weeks, like a period. It's time consuming and annoying, like a period. It seems all the women I know my age and older have had a hysterectomy. I want a hysterectomy. Getting old. What a racket.

I better live long enough to go (at least) an entire year without a period.

Back on point.

So why not cater to women with natural hair color too? Plus we still get our hair cut and blown out.

You don't have to hire me or put me in your show. I don't care.

I'm NOT coloring my hair. My hair is so thick you can cut and style it 100 ways. It'll grow back out in 3 months.

December 10, 2017