Christine Nevermore

I saw the most epic thing on the Vegas strip this evening, and it deeply saddens me that I did not get a video of it. Four young ladies in their late teens/early 20’s were huddled together posing sexy for group cell phone shot. Then all of a sudden a bird flies past the girls and flaps it’s wing (smack!) right across this one girl’s face as she was making duck lips at the camera. It was awesome! 

Let me tell something about the birds in Las Vegas, they’re completely sick of our shit. Twice now, TWICE, in one week, birds have flown out of trees and dove directly past my ears as I innocently walked by nearly jerking out my earbuds and almost making me drop my cell phone. Damn the man, Alfred Hitchcock! 

So I haven’t paid for any date sites yet. Both Match and ChristianMingle are kinda pricey. Not that I could join either site with any seriousness. It’s just, I really value Bob Gordon’s dating guidance regardless how much of a wretch I would be on those sites.

EXAMPLE: I spend many o’ serious heated hours debating with Christine over the differences between vampirism and cannibalism, one in particular. There’s a difference, Christine! There’s a difference! We’ve ALL seen the movies. We know how it works. First of all, cannibalism is the blood pudding to Swedes, unlike vampirism which is to Vlad who just littered the Saxon villages with impaled corpses. How rude! That’s in part why Swedes look so young for so long. Historically Swedes used the ENTIRE beast including its blood. Whereas your pale kind, Christine, just drinks blood but won’t eat the flesh of the beast for complete protein benefits. You might outlive me, in a pale scrawny unhealthy way, but I’ll always be restored into a young woman, young enough to be carded, UNTIL THE DAY I DIE, Christine! 

UNTIL THE DAY I DIE!

Hypothetically speaking of course. 

For the sake of argument.