I can hear the sounds of violins

Long before it begins. Make me thrill as only you know how. Sway me smooth, sway me now.

G'aaaaaaaah! I'm horrified!

When I was a kid, there was this really super nice old couple who lived kitty-corner from my house. Mr. & Mrs. White. Sweetest old couple in the world. Their grandkids became friends with the kids in the neighborhood. We all became friends. I'm still friends with them. All the kids in the neighborhold wanted to help this sweet old couple out with yard work, housework, and shoveling snow, just because they were so nice. No need to pay us. We just wanted to help them. They did of course pay us, because they insisted, but we would have all done it for free. My dad always gifted me with a new watch every Christmas, I don't know why but he just did, and one day the battery died in my watch and Mr. White noticed I wasn't wearing it, and he was like bring it over I'll put a new battery in. They were that kind of nice old people. Never underestimate the power of sincere kindness. I've worked in hospitality a long ridiculous stupid ass time. If you're just nice, patient, communicative, and not a creep, most everyone will bend over backwards to get you whatever you want. But these day...

Forget about it.

Both my grandpas died young. I only ever knew one grandpa in a hospital bed at home, dying, tubes everywhere hooked up to a machine until he died. I think I was maybe seven or eight years old when he died. And my other grandpa lived in Utah and died suddenly when I was like ten or twelve. To this day have no idea what he died of. So the only grandpa figure I ever really knew was Mr White. Sweetest man in the world. 60 or 70 years old then.

Now that I'm almost 51 years old, in eight days, I'm two different people. I'm going through "the change" and more often than not I feel like grandma though I have no children and not a huge fan of other peoples' kids. The other side of me is the girl who just blasted Mr Tinkertrain by Ozzy Osbourne, in my kitchen.

https://youtu.be/fy5L97Obq1k

When it comes to men, I'm looking for a guy my own age, up to 20 years older, as I always have, who might know the lyrics to Mr Tinkertrain, but definitely is not Mr Tinketrain himself. Make sense?

I'm surrounded by 60 to 70 year old men who don't know the lyrics to Mr Tinkertrain, they just are Mr Tinkertrain, and I'm fucking horrified.

You're old! You don't even have your own teeth! What the serious fuck are you doing with cock and pussy shots on your phone! And why the fuck are you showing me?? What the fuck is wrong with you?

AAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH gross!

Dick pics never turned me on to begin with, and I'm in NO hurry to see your 60 year old haggard wrinkly disgusting dick! Yuck!

It's just...

I'm going to look young forever. Why? I don't know? Its creepy, sad, I must have made a deal with Satan sometime ago. It's not cool. It just isn't! No one wants to be a kid forever! Nonetheless I'm stuck in the body. With this face. Nothing I can do. Withal, I'm still 51 years old. Women mature faster then men. So I'm about 70 years old now in intellectual years. Put your gall-damn haggard old man dick pics away!

Just be a nice sweet old man. Help me Mr. White! Keep the filth in the barber shops or wherever haggard old men talk sex. Blaaaaaaah!

It's so sad hearing a 62 year old man say "pussy". That's not language you use in your out loud voice with women, mister! Not when you're that old.

Its just... sad.

Happy New Year!