Came home this morning to my lights on again. And in case you think it’s me forgetting to flick my lights off when I leave at night, it’s not. The lights that are turned on, are lights I only use while reading or working on the computer. Plus just to make sure I wasn’t having a geriatric moment I filmed my apartment seconds before I left. No lights were left on.
Did I tell you I have a stalker? I have a few but this guy is particularly devoted.
He’s there every single night I work. He waits until my ride comes and then leaves when he sees I’m leaving. Same car. Same spot. Every night. He probably has keys to my apartment. God knows the building owner throws my apartment keys around like New York confetti on New Year’s. Loosening all the handles in my apartment. Poking little holes in my shirts. Ripping apart seams in my dresses. Stealing magnets off my fridge. Leaving my lights on. Renting is fun!
Oh look! The neighbor across the street parked one of his trucks in the lot! Right on top of the dirty infested mattress! Yeah! That’s right! You’re the boss! Fleas, bedbugs, hepatitis, and flesh eating bacteria don’t scare you! I think that neighbor has kids. Should be interesting to see how long until one of them gets sick and ends up in the hospital with a lung infection. I mean he parked his truck right over the filthy mattress. Nasty! Strangest neighborhood grudge match ever.
Then later in the day...
COPS!
The neighbors moved their truck from the lot, and now there’s two cop cars and an ambulance in front of the neighbor’s house.
Cop cars in Vegas look like mini SUV’s.
Strangest neighborhood grudge match ever. Over parking spots? I’m sure it started with something more but how petty that parking spots got involved.
Speaking of petty...
I’m the ring master to the most unbelievable shit show on earth five nights a week. If you ever want to know the absolute horrors of human beings, get a job anywhere or live anywhere in Las Vegas. The people out here all act like they’re rich and famous divas while demanding FREE cups of water, and defacing your bathrooms. It’s unbelievable. No one says “please” or “thank you” out here. No one. What a disgrace. You do realize those cups, lids, and straws actually cost money for your FREE water, right? I offered to work the worst shift, with the laziest and most immature crew, just for the summer to help the scheduling manager who could not keep my position filled during these hours. Aaaaand now I know why. Won’t be making that same mistake next summer I assure you. Definitely going back to my old shift and crew. What’s that saying? Let no good deed go unpunished. Yep. Sounds about right. Shit show ring master. That’s my official job title until October.
Def Leppard, has a residency in Vegas. On occasion I unfortunately encounter their fans. They’re my age only they look, god help them, many years older. They all wear the same cheap black and purple Def Leppard tee-shirt, the women still have shoulder length feathered hair, they’re all 75 pounds overweight, and they all have the same sad hopelessly plain expression on their faces. They remind me of my ex-husband. You know the type. He too never wanted the concert to end. If you go to their houses they have Def Leppard, mugs, posters, action figures, autographed drumsticks, etc, and they’re very proud of their Def Lep collections. They’re 50 year old fans who never want the concert to end. Could they at least be happy fans? Smile every once in a while? Why do they always look like they’re seconds away from slitting their wrists? “The concert is over? What??? NOOOOOO! WHY GOD?! WHYYYYYY!”
Going to the bank in Las Vegas, is unlike any banking experience anywhere I’ve ever been. I was third in line. Third! The first in line was a woman and her girl friend. The two women regaled the bank teller with a very, very long story about a friend of theirs who was stung by a bee and suffered a hematoma. The second in line was a man who wanted $20 in two dollar bills. That’s all he wanted. Two dollar bills. Why? No reason. Just because. He didn’t have anything better to do I guess. The bank teller didn’t have two dollar bills at the ready, and so left the bank window in search of two dollar bills. I was third in line. By the time I actually got to the bank teller I completely forgot what I needed.
The DUECE bus driver just mentioned The Green Door. 🤦🏻♀️ Good lord. Every DUECE driver thinks he’s a radio DJ. This particular driver thinks he’s Swinger McSwingface. Maybe he’s looking for a date. Looking for love in all the wrong places!
“Where did you meet your swing partner?”
“On the bus.”
On the bus? Really? Wow. Sexy.
And speaking of the DUECE, this morning while heading home I endured fifteen minutes of middle aged black men smack talking a DUECE security guard. Gee, that was fun. I assure you it wasn’t. The RTC has a strict no-sleeping policy on the bus. There’s security guards on board to regulate those simple RTC rules. The rules being: sit down, no outside drinks, and don’t fall asleep on the bus. Simple. This morning however one guy fell asleep on the bus. That guy happened to be black. The security officer, who happens to be white, kept waking the guy up until the officer eventually just threw the guy off the bus. As the security officer was throwing the guy off the bus for sleeping, the guy threatened to murder the security officer because apparently that’s what reasonable people do. The bus then took off before anything else could happen. Aaaand because the guy who got thrown off the bus was black, three other middle aged black men who were still on the bus could not let it go that a white officer threw a black guy off the bus for not following the posted RTC rules. And so I had to endure fifteen nonstop minutes of three black men LOUDLY smack talking over each other, “He should have kicked that white cop’s ass! Motherfucker! Who the fuck does that white cop think he fucking is! Come throw me off the bus motherfucker! Come throw me off the fucking bus!” Etc. Etc. Jesus Christ. Etc. Ridiculous. Etc. Etc. Just shoot me now. Etc. Because apparently rules don’t apply to some black men?
AND
Because the black men who were still on the bus chanted “white cop motherfucker” over and over, explain to me again who the racists are? If the security officer was black would there been a problem? Would those men have chanted “black cop motherfucker” instead?
Talk about that in your poli-sci civics language classes, teach’.
Not long ago I was in a Starbucks enjoying the sweet elixir of life, caffeine. I stopped to pee before leaving. As I’m doing this someone banged in the door, twice. RUDE. Clearly the occupied sign is on the door but that doesn’t stop this A-hole from banging on the door. I finish peeing, wash my hands, leave the bathroom and ask the nice kids working the Starbucks if they saw who the A-hole was banging on the bathroom door. They point to a couple and say, “it was her. She lost her cell phone. She’s been screaming at us because she can’t find it.” - Yep. Sounds about right. It’s just so typical of people these days. They lose their stuff and somehow it becomes everyone else’s fault.
My long time friend Brian, recently got his ass handed to him by his wife. She wears the pants in the family. When she caught Brian texting with female coworkers about meetings and pot lucks, his wife considered that flirting and demanded Brian stop talking to all women. Myself included. I told Brian the reason she acts this way is because she’s not pretty. Well, she’s not. And I text that to him intentionally because she reads his text messages. Pretty girls get their own attention. If a pretty girl wants attention all she has to do is leave her house or post a picture. No one is paying attention to Brian’s wife, trust me. Once a woman loses her bloom, if she has nothing in her life other than a husband, she gets crazy obsessive with keeping him. I don’t blame him for not leaving her though. He’s 52 years old. Like he wants to be that single guy at 52? No, of course not.
Headline news! NEWSFLASH! sharks live in the ocean. Just another perfect example of how dumb people are.
🙄
You have to deal with people nowadays like they’re the biggest morons on the planet.
BE CAREFUL water is wet.
BE CAREFUL hot coffee is hot.
BE CAREFUL ice is cold.
BE CAREFUL don’t want you fall down make boo boo.
That’s how you have to talk to people.
It’s interesting to me how liberal media applaud themselves, pat themselves on the back for reporting stories of people killing wild animals as Stories We Need Right Now. Really? Murdering animals are Stories We Need Right Now? I’m rooting for the coyote!
Makes you wonder who’s causing the negative reporting and mass hysteria to begin with, eh? It’s easy to be the hero putting out methodical fires that you started. But one day those fires will get away from you. It’ll destroy everything you worked so hard at to manipulate and connive. The result is only ruination and despair. Just ask my dad’s first wife how happy her life has been these past forty years.
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