Monday, February 29, 2016

I absolutely cannot WAIT

For Obama, to get OUT of the White House. I hate Trump, Clinton, Rubio, fuck the Bern, and can't stand Cruz, or Kasich. I'm with my friends and probably won't vote.

I wish English wasn't my first language. Maybe then I too could be delusional over how bad it truly is, and will continue to be, regardless of the next wrecking ball to sit in the White House.

I wish I had the heart to write something beautiful, inspiring and profound, but we're talking about a nation of people who in the past month, for Idiocracy, poisoned more than a half dozen Bald Eagles, just to watch them die, killed a dolphin for selfies, dry humped a shark for Facebook likes, and continue to murder each other and their children at schools, work, or wherever.

Right. The dolphin thing didn't happen in this country, but...

This is how we live now. Our nation. The one we (American kids) pledged allegiance to every morning after the bell rang. This is how we live.

I fight alongside Apple, protecting our rights, while most people in this country think it's ok to throw their litter all over (our) beaches, because they don't live here. Garbage cans everywhere and still I see families from the valley or downtown come to the beach and throw their fucking garbage wherever they want, just not in the cans. And they wonder why they pay $30-$40 for parking?

I love watching people get fined for doing shit signs everywhere tell you NOT to do. I love listening to them complain afterwards.

My life is awesome... I've worked hard for it... And YOU will not fuck it up for me.

My pen will always be mightier than your "sword".

It makes me laugh

When I misspell "Simone Gordon" and I've done it many times.

1,022 posts later

No one knows who you're talking about.

No one.

Except Apple. They know.

Oh. Right.

And Google.

And possibly Anderson Cooper.

No. Not Anderson Cooper. But definitely Apple and Google.

"Simone Gordon, who?"

No one knows who you're talking about.

I explain all that... Around here... Somewhere.

I don't want to

...watch 50/60 year olds fuck. And you can't make me.

You know the nation is in complete turmoil when I start regularly agreeing with CNN.

As I said before, I'm a registered Republican, but none of these morons deserves my vote.

Really?? Is THIS the best we can do??!!

Sunday, February 28, 2016

How to make a bad documentary

And I say that as a patron of movies. It was bad. I love documentaries, but some people are just getting lazy. It takes more than a hand-held and following people around, to make a documentary.

First of all (among a cluster of what was bad)...

No audio filter. No mics. No audio editing. I couldn't hear over 50% of  what was being said, which is probably a good thing since no one said anything interesting (of what I did hear) except the last guy at the very end, who expressed honest human feelings for his co-stars. --Which I probably wouldn't have heard clearly had he not been in a small room by himself when he spoke.

What "documentary" did I watch?

I'm not even going to say, other than...

It was filmed in a San Francisco, warehouse.

Horrible.

As a movie-goer, there needs to be questions asked, hard/interesting questions, different perspectives, subject/s matter, a continued storyline...

First year art class, my instructor told us our goal as artists is to find our center, a subject that will capture people' attention, a subject we care about, and from that point on, keeping their eyes, the eyes of all who want to see, on the canvas, the entire canvas. People watch because they're seeking something. Give it to them. Pull them in emotionally, mentally, physically, spiritually, by telling a story, a story they want to hear, or wish to relive.

No matter who he paints, the painter always paints himself.

But more than that, it takes interesting people to make interesting documentaries.

Too many people are just grabbing cameras and randomly shooting a week's worth of footage hoping for something decent.

No good.

Where's your story??

Saturday, February 27, 2016

My third time waking up

And I want to go back to sleep. Apparently got some things accomplished today though. There's grocery bags on the floor and a couple large bills on my counter. So either I went to the grocery store and the bank, or I mugged someone.

Think I'm just staying in tonight and watching a movie

Not that movie. 

A different movie.

Netflix?

Good morning

What happened? Still mixing my first cup of Futtbuckers.

Friday, February 26, 2016

Me too

VIP. She called me "An Asian Barbie doll" and told me how much she hates makeup. I told her not to worry they don't produce makeup strong enough.

Introductions made.

Thursday, February 25, 2016

(Metaphorically) cutting him open

And twitching my index finger over his exposed nerves. 

It's Thursday. It's what I do on Thursdays.

Wednesday, February 24, 2016

For ye legal minds

I've written a brief summery how legalized prostitution (could) work. You just need to put it together.

Read about it Right HERE

I didn't invent the terminology

Mandingo. It's what they call it.

MY point is, people, have consensual sex with whoever you want. It's when men try manipulating women/couples into having sex for his profit, that's bullshit.

Mandingo hunting racists?

How are black men not offended by white men seeking (only) black men to have sex with non-black women? It's one thing when a man seeks something he hungers. It's another thing ENTIRELY when he's put on the block for another man's sexual amusement.

I should do a documentary on this.

"No IR?"

Not true. I like white guys. I'm Asian. They're white. IR.

Sooooo what happened was...

My coworker speaks English, but he sometimes mumbles or talks too fast and I can't understand him. In response I'll (jokingly) say, "In English?" And apparently "In English?" Is a racist thing to say because my coworker isn't white.

Ok.

Um.

Two thing.

1. I don't know if you guys have noticed, but I'm not white either. Not entirely. Mostly not white. Obviously Asian. If you say to me, "In English?" I'm going to simply assume you didn't understand me, and repeat myself more clearly, followed with an oh-so-witty comeback.

2. Your not wanting me to say "In English" because my coworker isn't white, is in itself kind of a racist thing to say! Not all white people speak English. 

But fine. I won't say that anymore. I apologize. 

P.S. I'm not sure punching me was the appropriate response. But I'll let it pass because you hit like a 5 year old girl!

And another thing!

Remember when Alex said you looked white. You got offended! RACIST!! 

I was really hoping not to be called a racist this year. You guys called me a racist (some) 50 times last year. But in my defense, last year you guys called me a racist because I've never had sex with a black guy. I've never had sex with a Pacific Islander guy either but I'm a racist in your eyes ONLY for never having sex with black men. I challenged my accusers with a counter accusation of "conditional racism" especially since my accusers weren't even black men, but rather white women!

If you (the reader) can't see the humor in all this racial divide, WAIT it gets better!

So there's this artist of Latino descent...

I'm a huge fan of his work! Huge! I still am. However the current presidential election has turned him into a giant insane crazy person! He gets into rant-mode and just bashes Senators Ted Cruz and Mark Rubio, for not being "Latino enough" and he'll do this FOR HOURS, and hours, and hours. Jesus Christ! You could leave the room, spend 5 hours at the beach, come back, and he's still going!

I understand (to a point) when people remark "so-and-so is not (ethnic) enough" I'm accused of it all the time. I'm not Korean-enough. I shouldn't make fun of Asian people. Etc. YOU DO REALIZE I'm just trying to lighten the mood. That's all. 

Racism, serious business. Presidential election, again serious business. I would never with full intended heart randomly and purposely hurt people. BUT...

Some of you just beat things into the ground until (it seems) you're almost begging someone to poke a little fun at you. 

Hi! 

And another thing!

This whole #Apple war... 

Before you grab your guns and start shooting people, understand what the government is asking Apple to do. I'm not mentioning this because I have an iPhone, I'm bringing it up because Apple, as the government loves to remind us, is a product. Agreed. Apple sells products. We, the consumer, buy Apple products. But this our CHOICE and our right to spend our money on whatever products we want WITHOUT the government seizing control over our products and privacy. 

Do you really think the government would only use the encryption program "just on" suspected terrorism? 

"Terrorism. San Bernardino." And these are the only three words the government needs to say to get people riled up... particularly during election time. 

(Isn't terrorism why you have a barricade of guns stashed in every room of your house? Why do YOU need encryption software? You got guns!!) 

If this encryption software got into the hands (of anyone) imagine the profiling that would follow. We have rights. You don't get free access to my products, my life, because it would make your job "easier".

And what happens if this encryption software got into the wrong hands? 

Facebook. Twitter. Snapchat... I don't oppose the government reading timelines. 

Just...

Stay the hell off my phone. Perverts.

Monday, February 22, 2016

Magnum party!

I mean "magnet party". I only have one 1 magnet on my fridge. It's lonely. 

The other party will happen at DV.

Awww he's STILL mad?

Angry grrrrr!! Lol!! Didn't I turn him down (what?) five years ago?? Yay coping skills!

Ever see the movie YOUNG & BEAUTIFUL? If I remember correctly Euros are close in equivalent to American money correct? And she was only asking $300-$500 Euros? She should have asked for more. I thought she was gorgeous. 

And...

Someone needs to tell Francois Ozon, girls don't masturbate that way.

Sunday, February 21, 2016

Gonna unicorn Dirty Vegas, hard

Never been solo. And in 2 1/2 months my hair will have grown out more, and calmed down. Or so I hope. I have so much hair it's ridiculous. It's why I didn't cut it again. Asian afro may look good on some. Not me.

See you in Vegas.

(Just look for the Asian chick with platinum hair, and black ends. I suspect there won't be many of us.)

P.S.

Like This Tweet says.

Saturday, February 20, 2016

"No money no funny!"

"When I'm not in front of an audience I shut down my sense of humor. Why give away (all this) for free? People might expect me to be funny, and charming when not on stage. Can't have that. Mwa! Ha! Ha! Haaaaaa!"

Dude. Really? What part of This hairdo says I give a god damn??

Friday, February 19, 2016

"Remember that day..."

"We murdered that rare dolphin in Santa Teresita? Look here's a picture of it! Yeah, the dolphin died when we took it out of the water, BUT LOOK we have a picture of us with it!! How cool is that!!"

Yes. "Cool." I'd like to take pictures with those assholes who killed that dolphin, but only if I can shove their heads into 2 feet of water first.

It might take a while to get the right picture. Your head submerged in water. Light bouncing of the ripples as you struggle to breathe. You know how it is with selfies.

"Are you there god it's me Pacquiao?"

"Are you there God? It’s me, (Pacquiao). I just told my mother I want a bra. Please help me grow God. You know where."

I'm now on Judy Blume's hitlist.

President Pacquiao?

His campaign in the Philippines, will be very interesting to watch. Is there a simple Tagalog (or Filipino) translation for all that is Trump vs Pope?

Some quick fact checks for Pacquiao, before his presidential Trump-like "insane-campaign" begins...

Pope Francis, didn't build the Vatican (that's been up for a little while now) and he also didn't build the Vatican wall. Hey! Ever been to St. Peter's Square??

Oh, and...

Pacquiao, good news, Pope Francis, has heard of you!

Bad news, he doesn't like you.

Maybe it's time for you to switch religions?

Politics. Bad for sex.

A car backfires, and the next thing you know 5 students are killed by the gun another student brought to campus, OR something truly emotional happens on campus and the next thing you know...

Unless these students took military boot camp, their gun training isn't enough!

I remember back in the day when, "Do you have a condom?" Was the one of the most important questions I'd ask a guy before considering sex with him. Now it's...

"What's your opinion on gun control?"

And...

"Are you religious?"

And...

"How do you feel about immigration laws?"

And...

"How do you feel about Obama Care?"

I've turned down guys this year, 6 years ago I would have LOVED to have sex with, but not now.

Not ever.

"Tragedy on yet another school campus..."

Prepare your speech now president/elect.

Be sure your defense attorney blames the campus gun law.

18. 21. Huge difference! Right.

A mere three years to stalk the guy fucking your girlfriend while you're at football practice, before legally buying a handgun and killing him.

What could possibly go wrong??

CNN reported this morning that University of Texas, students will soon be able to carry handguns on campus.  Read the story here

Because nothing says "gun safety" like semi automatics and teenagers away from home for the first time!

Does Pacquiao know...

People can read what he posts online?? Maybe he doesn't know. Maybe he's just (that) stupid.

His ongoing religious rants about gay/lesbian sex, and sex outside of marriage, meanwhile attempting a political career, makes me think maybe he's just... dumb.

In other words, he's PERFECT for politics.

I get hit on by...

Better looking women who are paid to have sex with you.;)

It's a good thing I never...

Went to Sunday school, church, bible camp, enrolled in a Christian prep, or all that could have been embarrassing!

No nuns. Minnesota is heavily Lutheran.

Have you never seen an episode of Fargo??

E: my dad didn't become a Catholic, until I was in my late teens. 18 or 19. I was on my own by then. Prior to converting dad was raised Mormon. Nope, I did all that because I was curious.

The things we do when we're curious....

(I've attended Catholic services. They're long and tedious.)

Pacquiao's gay bashing

Not all Catholics, are intolerable of homosexuality. My dad was as Catholic, as any other, but if you were a friend of one of his kids regardless of race, creed, sexual orientation, regardless of your past, or present occupation, etc, if I brought you home to meet my dad, he would have given you a warm sincere hug the moment I introduced you, and then immediately start cooking something for us to eat. All of which has nothing to do with religion. That's just the kind of HUMAN BEING my dad was.

If it weren't for my dad, I too would have bad feeling regarding what Pacquiao, said, but Pacquiao, said what he said because he's an asshole, not because he's Catholic.

Though I still stand by my "Asians and PI's were brainwashed by the white man's religion, etc." comment.

It could've happened to you!

The first time (you) pumped your dick into a tree trunk, it didn't go down for hours afterwards! (You) could have landed in the ER too!

Some men have asked if I would pump my vagina, first of all YUCK!, and it looks like a giant vagina bee hive afterwards. I've seen videos. It's just... No.

If you only have ONE job, why mess with it??

"Dear University of Phoenix. I am interested in summer enrollment."

Same thing

Philippines. Thailand. Not the big four. And equally heavily "lady boi" populated. Anytime a famous white guy says he's going to the Philippines or Thailand, "lady boi" is what everyone thinks first. Then gay prostitution. Then pedophiles. Then sweat shops. Then...

Thanks media. You've totally corrupted me.

Holy Pacquiao!

Asians and Pacific Islanders, were brainwashed years ago to not be free thinkers. Pacquiao, is already behaving like a political drone. FYI the term "lady boi" originated from the Philippines. So some of the "girlies" he may have tangled with in the past might not have been entirely girly.

Monday, February 15, 2016

If you like the pics, take 'em

I have a bunch of flash drives filled with photos and videos, just sitting around collecting dust. Some of it's pretty good. Use what you want. Sell it. Use it for ads. Throw it away. I don't care.

If you have an "Asian fetish" following, they might like it.

Still the Unicorn, huh

I would have though homosexual Catholic republicans, were the unicorns, but no, it's still bi-sexual single women.

Why oh why not a lesbian?!

I get hit on by some of THEE most beautiful women.

The cruelty of it all.

What in the HECK?!

You must watch the Netflix documentary TABLOID.

I advise a little prep first: five shots of whisky (keep the bottle you'll need it)

And...

I suggest watching it during the day because you'll want to leave the house immediate afterwards --you simply won't feel right inside.

Sunday, February 14, 2016

Lunch with the girls

They just scared the desire for sex right out of you, didn't they? 

Rhetorical question. Don't answer. 

In 8th grade gym class during AKA sex ed., we were shown slides of what aborted fetuses looked like. 

Lutherans.

I'm a pro-choice Republican. But as I said in past blogs, I'm a conservative. Not so much a republican by society's definition. 

One observation (this ol' lady) can't help but notice among the Twitter female youths, is their wide range abstract understandings of feminist movements, past and present. 

To me, Judge Judy, is a far wiser, stronger, brilliant "feminist" than (say) self declared feminist Gloria Allred.

I want to see girls, young ladies, and women, be strong on their own two feet, be responsible, earn your success, know that with every reward risks are attached. You're not immune to hard times. Nothing is for "free" simply because you're a woman. 

My beef with Gloria Allred, is the way she represents women makes them look dumb. Gloria Allred, makes women she represents look helpless and useless.

I have a problem with that. A big problem.

So...

When America's female young (18-29, voting age) express how little they care about the subjects of sexual equality, sexual free speech, and sexual liberation (for that too was/is a feminist movement) opting instead public affirmations of, "Orgasms are great, but sometimes I just want to take my bra off and scratch like an ape" as an angsty young feminist movement... is grossly misguided! 

You're not making a feminist statement. You're merely announcing the end of your day. Agreed, at the end of my day I take my bra off and feel relieved also. As do/did billions of women across the globe for generations before you were born. There was/is no problems with women taking off their bras for comfort at the end of their day. 

It's one thing when a young lady expresses scratching her boobs at the end of her day after removing her bra, hi-five I do it too, but it's something else entirely when that expression immediately follows "Orgasms are great, but..."

But what?

What does one have to do with the other?

This is where young women, particularly 18-29 years of age, lack understanding of feminist movements. 

There are many different types of feminists and they don't all agree with one another. But comparing a woman's orgasm to the end of a woman's day...

Well there's no comparison.

One is sexual liberation. The other is uncomfortable underwear.

If women want the equality of men in the work place, in society, in dating, in marriage, etc., it's defeatist criticizing other women who don't share your exact feminist or female politics and priorities. 

But first, my dear young voter ladies, please get a dictionary and look up the word "feminist" before you start making declarations in its name.

(Help me Jane Fonda! Circa 2003, or whenever it was you started flashing your epic boobs all over the place!)

Young ladies who are pro boob-scratching, but anti boob/cleavage flashing, have one agenda and that's the "I hate other women" movement. So not a feminist!

Equally, why are (straight) men applauding women hating other women who enjoy flaunting their sexuality? What are you (straight) men applauding exactly? "Yay I never want to get laid!"

?

Furthermore, real feminists don't give two fucks what men think about their personal bob scratching time!

I've read "a million" times online how this female loves sucking dick, loves getting dick pics, etc., but then throws down a lawsuit if someone dares sends her a dick pic.

?

Again, God damnit, Gloria Allred!

You have to pay attention to what's being said on social media. Pay attention! And for the most part it seems as if (people) are. 

Good!

I don't know entirely what's going on in these young ladies heads. But understand this, who you vote for, will effect YOU in the four years that follows AS A WOMAN. Marriage. Kids. Love. Money. Tax. Freedom. All of it. 

Now...

Maybe I don't know anything. Maybe I haven't lived long enough either. Or maybe I've lived too long. Maybe I'm the last person you should listen to.

But I will tell you this much...

I'm happy. Really happy.

I have amazing friends who I love and cherish. I'm where I want to be in my life and it sure as hell didn't come easy.

And...

My romance/friendship with my long time friend of 20+ years has lasted longer than any marriage I know of including my dad's. Both of them. Combined.

Bearing that in mind...

I don't know who I'm voting for. I'm not voting for Trump. Or Cruz. Or Rubio. Or Clinton.

Christ.

(Seriously, is this the best America, can do?)

Happy Valentine Days!

May you get to be with those you love on this day, and every day.

Every day is Valentines Day.

I'm weary of people who only acknowledge one day as being the only day to express love, friendship, and Valentine romance. 

If you live by the ocean, it's presently only 48 degrees and foggy. The fog has returned in a big way. Which is great. Moisture in the air keeping things green. If you don't have to be up, don't be! This is one of those chilly morning made for snuggling in bed... at least until the fog rolls back towards the ocean.

I'm working today. Making your lives more fairy-tail charming in a cheap and sloppy kind of way! ;)

Saturday, February 13, 2016

I should also add...

Our family members who died from cancer, chose the way they wanted to die. Both our family members being strict Catholics, neither one of our loved ones would help themselves to regain their appetite after chemo. Neither one of them would smoke medicine herb, and so they literally starved to death.

It was horrible to witness. But they died their way.

As we all should.

And maybe I am way too young now to feel this (want) of retirement...

But these past 5 years I've earned my white hair. That and, I like the look of confusion on peoples' faces when they see me. They look at my face, then my hair, then my face, then my hair, face, hair, face, hair...

"Ok thank you, ma'am. Miss? Ma'am? Miss? Mmmma'...?"

The answer's still no

And not in a "No" means "Yes" kind of way.

I don't want any drama in my life. I'm (finally) exactly where I want to be.

Don't you just have fun anymore?

Enjoy life. It's so short.

Both my long time friend and I have experienced loved ones die horrible deaths from cancer. When you live through that, when you're survived by cancer, all you want to do is enjoy your life.

Just enjoy it.

And laugh.:)

"Black hole sun..."

"Won't you come, and wash away the rain?"

You know I was kidding, right? Right??

I get the "black hole" sanitizing principle. So typing the word "censored" over the black holes you guys were already using as censors, is just...

First of all, does no one on your staff own Illustrator, or Photoshop... or a smart phone?

Also...

The only reason I keep my Twitter page is because I have a long time crush on Mister Cook, and he posted a pic of himself naked, and he just adopted the cutest little puppy, and posted a video of the little guy running in slo-mo to Led Zeppelin, and even though I'm not a Led Zeppelin fan at all, he's just the cutest little puppy, and I'm a sucker for hot guys with cute little puppies, and...

Anyway look, at a point in my life I just hang out with my friend, family, people I love, make random observations, and have a place to occasionally post some naughty pics.

It's the cutest little puppy EVER!

AND if people drinking before noon bothers you, whatever you do DO NOT meet us at the beach this morning!

Friday, February 12, 2016

Still hip with young people?

Just stood in line behind three teenage kids who's entire two minute conversation could be summed up with these 6 words, "Oh shit never mind. Fuck it."

We're (here). Right (here). Eye to eye. I get you.

I love a man who makes me laugh

Sex. Laughter. The beach. A glass bottle of red wine. The perfect date.

If you're going to "send" a message, or attempt to be funny sending a message, put a little effort into it please.

No one likes a lazy hambone.

No one.

John come lately!

I did that joke already, sir, 22 hours ago...

Regarding the "black holes" an adult website I'm on is using to edit adult content.

But that's ok. I love your work. You're awesome!

Wednesday, February 10, 2016

31 degrees is still freezing

If by global warming YOU mean...

As a kid, winter temps in MN got as low as -15 degrees plus windchill for -20 degrees of brutal unlivable outdoor conditions.

Today...

 Or rather this Friday, the low temp in MN is reported at -11 degrees.

So if by global warming you mean in 30 years the winter temperatures in MN has risen -9 degrees, then yes, global warming.

Freezing temperature is 32 degrees, FYI. Water freezes at 32 degrees.

Therefor...

So do humans.

But like I said before, enjoy your global warming at -11 degrees!

Tuesday, February 9, 2016

Chicago?

Christ. I can't even make fun of that.

Wisconsin

Thank you!

P.s. Enjoy your 18 degree global warming day!

Dear media

Please go back to fat shaming. Most of us can lose fat if we try. The other thing, not so much.

It's not that I didn't get your jokes

I just don't think it's funny if you've never lived the punchline.

Just ONE day!

It's voting season. I get it. I do. I grew up plastering lawn signs together, door knocking, handing out literature, licking envelopes, I've done it. All of it.

But is it possible we could have just one day, ONE day where we don't give politicians we hate our undivided attention?

Feminism overload

I hugely support a woman's rights for what's FAIR... But (on this subject) some men have serious mommy issues methinks when their voice screams louder than mine!

If your movie is about Italians

In this day and age...

Than it should have Italians in it. Not actors of different origins pretending to be Italians.

If you're a woman and your stage show includes parody of snowballing a 10 man GB, well then...

You know what I'm saying.

Monday, February 8, 2016

Yes let's all hate SoCal

Because that's the cool thing trending with people pre-microwave era. 

Let's all hate SoCal with the warm weather, ocean, diversity, loving friends, family. 

Hate it all! Don't move or anything. Just hate it!

"Get off my lawn!!"

The comedy of it is, YOU hate every piece of technology you're on. You don't find humor in anything, and now everything is a political movement rather than something fun and enjoyable.

Now you're just BORING.

Maybe the reason you don't like technology is because you lost complete grasp on how to use it.

Your problem.

All these little self-help pictures of how touchy feely we should be, fuck off. At your age if you don't know how to be a good, kind, loving person to those who matter to you, and at least half-assed civil towards those who don't, without little online post-it notes, it's my understanding Alaska is just filled with people like YOU.

I'm happy. You can hate that too. 

So what?

Party date

I haven't been to an adult club/event in a while. I'm going to see if I can Twitter myself a date.

Because that seems safe.

No better or worse than finding a date on Smash.com

Wait. Is that a real website?

My first 48 hours on twitter

I got a lot in there! Penis joke. Billboard junk snapping selfies. Booze cruise at Vons. Football rants. Aggro monkeys. Kitty love. Mustached myself. Short joke. Swing club joke. Chinese New Year, monkey rant... I love Twitter.

The best part is reading tweets from people I once thought were cool only to learn they use Twitter to throw shade on Twitter and Twitter users. What's the point of being on Twitter if you're not going to feed the occasional boredom that craves the instant gratification of (something) right now! Welcome to the forward generations of technology. If you don't like it, don't use it!

Parents today. What can you do really.

In three years I maybe bashed Google Blogger... Twice?... And only because mobile pic upload is ridiculous!

I'm going to start posting naked pics of myself on Twitter and see what happens.

Maybe I can scare them off.

Friday, February 5, 2016

Images?

I can't see them either. Who knows. I don't pay for this blog. 

When I have time I'll set up my Twitter profile. 

I'm still unpacking. Can't seem to stop running out of hangers.

First World Problems.

Thursday, February 4, 2016

Throwback Thursday!!!

(Rare photo of natural hair color.)

Sorry Jo, cropped you out. You always complained you hated this picture because you were chewing gum at the time, and the cam got ya with your mouth open...

Wednesday, February 3, 2016

Dear Floyd's 99, see you this weekend

Floyd's 99 barbershop, lets do this!

I'll post my "fingers in mouth" photo afterwards (somewhere).



 
 

"And another thing!"

You don't like girls with short hair. I get it. Really. I do. You sent me this link twice now. I didn't respond the first time because we already had this conversation, AND I'm busy moving stuff over to the woman cave.

I'm going to try out Floyd's 99 barbershop, over the weekend.

My hair's short. It's going to stay short for a while. Christ. Let it go!



Tuesday, February 2, 2016

Is Gloria Allred, defending her?

She wants to withdraw her lawsuit with the option to refile later on, AND she wants him to pay for her attorney fees?? Ha!!!

Well if it's anything like my experience it'll go something like this...

(The judge addressing my ex's lawyer) "Why are you back in my courtroom I already ruled on this matter?"

"We want the defendant (me) to pay Plaintiff's (his) attorney fees."

There was approximately two seconds of sheer utter silence before my lawyer and I laughed, and laughed, and laughed!!

It's great being sued for money by people who then want you to also pay for their attorney fees.

NO of course he wasn't awarded attorney fees.

That morning in court cost me four months rent but on the plus side it's become a running gag. "And don't forget attorney fees!"