(un)taint(ed)

We had science class together. She sat few rows behind me next to a girl who was also in my home room. Most days she attended class with a fat bruise on her check and/or a black eye, if she attended class at all. When I asked the girl from my home room why (the other girl) always had a bruised face, I was told rather firmly to mind my own business. And so I did. But the bruised girl always bothered me.

Never snitch.

Mind your own business.

Don't cry or I'll give you something to cry about.

These three advisements were strongly embedded in my upbringing. It is an all too familiar Midwest code.

One sunny afternoon during a school summer break, I was in my back yard, sitting on the grass, leaned against a tree, shorts, summer blouse, bare feet, knees drawn to my chest, reading a book. A few boys from the neighborhood scrambled through my yard shooting at wild rabbits, squirrels, birds, anything that moved. I've always been opposed to hunting, but this wasn't hunting, this was just two boys injuring, maiming, or killing living creatures to better their aim for future hunting kills. Not my back yard!! And when I yelled at the boys to get out of my yard, one of the boys shot directly, intentionally at me. I didn't even know I was hit until after the boys raced out of the yard.

The boy who shot me, got me in the leg.

The doctor who removed the pellet used a surgical utensil resembling a large pair of metal tweezers, no local, no anesthesia, just dug the metal tweezers into my leg and plucked the pellet out. I was so angry I didn't feel anything. But the scar remains.

When my leg was bandaged, people asked me, "What happened to your leg?" and I instinctively told them to mind their own business.

Boy will be boys.

Well one of those boys shot me in the leg with a pellet gun when I tried getting him to stop shooting animals in my yard. I wonder what that boy does for a living today?

How many risky lapse around society must there be until it becomes someone's business?

Girls with bruised faces.
Girls getting shot in the leg.

Mind your own business.

Some psychologists follow the teachings that humans are incapable of fully maturing beyond childhood.

Boys will be boys.

Others believe it is in our perception of sex, desire, lust, that navigates how we treat one another, especially of the gender we are most sexually attracted to.

Girls will be girls.

I am among those who believe 'mind over matter'.

I chose to be unmarried. I chose not to have children.

Contrary to popular belief among those who "know me" through this blog alone...

I value marriage. I value what marriage stands for. But in my eyes, in my heart, with every fiber of my being, in this day and age, the marriage I believe in, no longer exists. The only kind of marriage I would commit to, is a dead language, like Latin, who first pronounced it's union sacred to begin with. Perhaps it is not a coincidence no one speaks Latin, anymore either.

I'm all for having a special day recognizing my love for someone, but I don't need a legal document as confirmation. Let's just throw a private party with family and friends whenever we feel like it. As many times a year as we feel like.

Because,

Today we love each other.

Tomorrow...  ?