Hooker penguins

Luke Evans is gay? Of course he is. He’s hot. My gaydar remains on point. 

LOOP, girl. 

“They just want money.”

No shit. How about that? I’m guessing a website where women are bent over showing the entire internet her SEE U NEXT TUEDAY, and lives in Las Vegas, aren’t looking for love on any convention weekend. 

“Looking for love in all the wrong places.” 🎶 Everybody sing! 

No money, no honey. You know the rules. 

Dear Orson Wells spirit ghost, what was your deal with A Touch Of Evil? That is without question the loudest movie I’ve ever seen. 

I tried watching ‘The Ballad Of Buster Scruggs’ but they lost me after the first gunfight in the street. If the whole movie was about that one cowboy in white, you know who I’m talking about, I’d have kept watching it. Now that’s a movie. Chop-chop Netflix. Get on it.

And another thing!

In basic language the term you’re looking for is moving pictures. In art, they’re called images. In film they’re called moving pictures. Images from moving pictures are called stills. I say this to you because when you call images “content” I know we’re not talking about the same thing. 

(Sigh) 🙄 

No. For so many reasons.

I get it. You’re a single guy just trying to get laid. But I too am single and so here’s a piece of advise directly from single me to single you — Single men better off hitting up couples. Why? Because they’re the ones who have that dynamic in their marriage. Kink. Boredom. Whatever. It’s not anything I understand but I long ago quit trying. I’m a conservative. The marriage I want, at my age, with men my own age who are also single, doesn’t exist anymore. Which is why I’m still single.

At 50 years of age, I won’t find old fashion love again for another ten to fifteen years at least. Not until we’re about ten years from our deathbeds and neither one of us wants to die alone. Then I’ll find what I’m looking for in a spouse and/or partner. 

Until then young man, you are definitely not what I’m looking for. Which I why I listed my age preference 49 and up. If you weren’t alive during the Ford administration we’re not going to have much to talk about and I’ve always been one of those girls you have to get into my head before my pants. Dig? Unless...

No money, no honey. You know the rules. 

And THAT is my favorite thing to say after a very attractive male coworker said it to me once regarding his customers. It sounds different coming from an attractive man. When women say it, it’s just a matter of fact. When a good looking man says it, it’s fun to hear.

Women do not commonly have that charisma and witty repartee required to hold the attention of most audiences. It’s why men are more successful and paid more in movies. Men are better narrators. Can you imagine if THE OUTSIDERS were a cast of women instead of Tom Cruise, and Patrick Swayze? That movie would seriously suck. That’s right GhostBusters 2016, your movie sucked. 

Ladies can be 100% tits and ass if that’s how you want to advertise yourself, but then don’t act surprised when us women call you tits and ass. I don’t owe you anything. You’re not my sister. I know who my friends are. You’re not one of them, little miss tits and ass.

Sure, I’ll put images out there, and deal with maggots like the obvious married guy cheating on his wife who then has the audacity to send me angry messages when I don’t comply to his hasty 3am chat requests two weeks after he desperately tried to to fuck me while his wife was in the hospital following a near fatal car accident, but I also don’t list “tits” as being a reason why any respectable employer should hire me...

Nor do I list being a woman, a minority,or an AARP applicant. 

Women were far smarter and intuitive in the 50’s than they are today. Women today are idiots, thank you Kardashians for lowering the intellectual bar, and raising the superficial one. 

Women in the 50’s were undeservingly treated like shit. Women today more often than not, deserve it. 

Be that as it may...   

No 🖕🏻