So... it wasn't about Nazis in Ukraine, then?
If by "International Terrorism" you mean aiding Ukraine after Russian soldiers blew up buildings and people for no reason, then might you sir pick a language and learn the correct meaning of words.
A "conflict" is what will happen if a hairstylist cuts more than two inches off the back. Blowing up people, schools, and murdering children simply because you think you're entitled isn't a conflict, it's war, you pathetic excuse for a human being.
Remember when the bad guys were afraid of America? Those were good days.
MAE 31, TUESDAY
(1:55pm)
You will never eat hummus the same. Oh god. That is hummus isn’t it??
(1:33pm)
Nevada is heavy with sky activity. Remember the lenticular clouds I posted earlier this month? And just the other night around midnight I captured shards of light in the dark sky with a few hovering orbs. 👽🛸
(1:22pm)
(9:49pm)
I’m looking forward to Amber Heard’s next movie.😂
He doesn’t look at you for the same reason I don’t look at dog poop. I know the poop is there. I don’t need to look at it.
(6:40pm)
I’m very serious about growing out my grey hair again. It has to get through this phase:
To get to this phase:
(5:18pm)
I don’t think he’s going to get 50 million but I would be satisfied getting the 7 million back since she clearly didn’t donate the money as she claimed… That said, YES 👏🏻 Johnny Depp in Beetlejuice II, make it happen movie gods!
(3:36pm)
In my mind it's not porn unless there's a hot stud in the room. And I'm somewhere else.
On this Memorial Day I would just like to say thank you
And
Give Ukraine the rockets! Give it to them!
MAE 29, SUNDAY
(8:35pm)
Just finished binge watching STRANGER THINGS season 4. Awesome.
Did NOT see that coming. Loved it.
Now I can move on with my life.
(5:16pm)
They mention stroke in STRANGER THINGS, S.4.
I almost choked on my sunflower seed. Indeed, STRANGER THINGS. Indeed.
(4:30pm)
OKAY how many horror movie nods did you see in season 4?!
So far...
Hellraiser
Freddy Krueger
Fright Night
Amityville Horror
Resident Evil
The Grudge
Friday the 13th
(4:05pm)
Watching the remaining episodes of season 4 STRANGER THINGS so I can get on with my life.
C'mon! That clock bell is totally!
(7:30am)
I love this. Fuck Amber Heard.
I love this man.
Get it girl!
(7:25am)
How cool. I so want to not like this Guy but he makes it hard when he does this.
(3:02am)
I’m stopping after this episode.
I am.
I really am.
(2:21am)
Late night my darlings.
I'm currently on E.4 S.4 of STRANGER THINGS. 80's soundtrack of course being as how it's set in the 80's but every time I hear the bells chime all I can think of is...
And does season 4's vibe totally give you Stephen King feels?
So good.
MAE 28, SATURDAY
(11:52pm)
What am I doing this Saturday night off? Binge watching STRANGER THINGS season 4 of course!
MAE 27, FRIDAY
(7:01pm)
Oh my little darlings, so much going on today.
First of all...
80's films where there was that one "token" black guy, and this may shock those of you who never traveled when you were young, or simply didn't grow up in the Midwest where many of these films are set in, he's not the token black guy, he's the only black guy. The Midwest, back then, wasn't a hot spot for minorities. Didn't see a whole lot of Hispanics in the Midwest shucking corn in 1983.
When I was growing up in small town Minnesota, if you were a girl there was pretty and not pretty. Pretty meant you were thin, long beautiful hair, good skin, big eyes, good teeth, and glossy lips. It wasn't until I moved to California, Los Angeles, in 1992 that I repeatedly heard, "Wow you're really pretty for an Asian girl." -- And me being young, adorable, and naive, had no idea that was an insult.
ALSO...
Before moving to Los Angeles, I lived in San Francisco from 1989-(end of)1991, where Asians, as in no generation American Asians, absolutely hated me for being American or in their eyes "white".
In the 80's All-American meant pretty corn fed Caucasian. Not pretty sophisticated New York vegetarian, or pretty edgy Los Angeles surfer, no, pretty corn fed tractor driving white. I don't know who branded this, or where it came from, but even to this day, most Americans would agree "All-American" is the white quarterback captain of the varsity football team from somewhere in the Midwest.
Whats-his-face from A&F was an asshole. I mean. He didn't think anything different from what Americans already thought. He just said it out loud. And that's what makes him asshole. People don't know you're an asshole until you start talking. It's ok to be a non-physical A-hole. Sticks and stones. But he was also stupid for saying it out loud while being a business owner. That's all.
Oh
Right
And for being a Harvey Weinstein.
Ew.
(6:38pm)
People don't just die in their sleep of "natural causes" at age 67.
Um. No.
Something very not right was going on in his body knowingly or not.
(5:36pm)
I'm watching White Hot: Abercrombie & Fitch. Takes me back. Years ago, I mean yeeeeaaars ago when I was young and adorable in my early to mid 20's I worked for Victoria's Secret. All the young ladies who worked with me all looked the same. We all had the same look. We were all in our early to mid 20's, we all had long black hair we wore in many different hair styles (up or down), we were all super skinny, we all wore lots of eye make up to make our eyes super big, we all wore pale lipstick, and we all dressed in tight black cocktail dresses with black shoes (flats or heels). This was how we looked when we went in for our interviews, and I would soon come to find out after being hired this is the sole reason why I got the job, because of the way I looked going into the interview. I fit in with their new look. A pretty young blonde woman once asked me after seeing my coworkers and I if girls had to have black hair to work here, and my coworker at the time, a total snob, responded "Yes" and walked away.
When I think about it now, we could have been some strange London goth cocktail party planet episode on Star Trek.
Too funny.
The former male models on the documentary are funny. I mean, they poke fun at themselves now. It's a good documentary.
(2:37pm)
There once was a ship that put to sea
The name of the ship was The Billie Of Tea…
(2:23pm)
Iowa. Nebraska. I want cows. Or at least a few goats.
MAE, 26, THURSDAY
(5:48pm)
After talking with my boss there needed to be some schedule swapping anyway. My coworker (the me during the day) needed Monday off, so now it seems I have Saturday night off to work Monday night instead and won't be working with my work rival, the chest-thumper. Good. Listen ladies, I'm open minded about a lot of things, eh. But I have zero tolerance when it comes to women acting like men (especially) men circa 1930. I'm not a fan of feminists. I'm not into bull dyke lesbians. Fucking gross. None of it. Go wear your vagina onesies some place else, bitch. The second you get up in my face I go Korean-crazy. Korean horror movie/Squid Games crazy. I don't speak Korean but I know the language. DNA.
Korean, Native American, and German... I suppress it all in until you breach that two inch mark from my face. The only Asians crazier than Koreans are Thai. Just ask Aramis. That girl did drive-by reconnaissance on his whereabouts every night for two years before he wore down and said, "Fuck it. Just move in with me. Please don't murder my parents."
Look, it's just a job. I'm 53 years old with a pre-existing blood pressure/heart condition. I don't want to go out taking on some ugly dyke chest-thumper.
But I will.
(3:23am)
I know. We can’t joke about hating your coworker now.
(1:48am)
Someone should do these outlines of me committing near misdemeanors in the work place around my work enemy.
(12:13am)
Ooooohkay. There's bitch chest-thumper at my work who feels the need to "show me the right way" to do my job. We'll see about that chest-thumper. Challenge accepted.
MAE 25, WEDNESDAY
(8:32pm)
I appreciate anyone who understands the absurdity of it all.
(5:19pm)
In my mind it's not porn unless everyone is speaking Sims.
(*Absurd: arousing amusement or derision; ridiculous.)
(3:10pm)
All the bad guys around the world who have considered invading American soil today are watching our news and thinking, "Nope, hard pass. They're crazy murdering their own children over there."
Once upon time America was powerful, unified, fierce. At the very least agreeable on all matters regarding family. Today, America loses their shit when their cappuccino has too much foam. Hard pass.
What's happened to our country?
(3:00pm)
We're at the finger pointing stage of grief.
(2:48pm)
I don't understand hurting children. I really don't. But you know this will be about gun control with 2nd amendment fighters sounding like giant D-bags protecting their right to bear arms.
Why would you want to bring a child into this toxic horrible world.
(1:49am)
I don't understand why they killed the shooter. They couldn't have just Karate Kid swiped the leg and taken him into custody? Now no one will ever know why he murdered children unless he grew a beard, went into the woods, and wrote a memoir.
(1:48am)
Love it 🤭
MAE 24, TUESDAY
(10:21pm)
Why anyone would want to bring a child into this world is beyond me.
(8:35pm)
FUCKING WHY?!!
(12:13pm)
In my mind it’s not porn unless they’re doing it on a Snorlax bean bag.
(11:45am)
97.5. That was my job’s health inspection score. Thankfully that’s over. I’ve never been so stressed out. I have that horrible repetitive disorder. I can clean a surface but to calm my nerves I better clean it two more times to make sure it’s really clean so it won’t keep me up at night. I was running around with the date gun for two hours just tagging everything. I’m very nervy that way. It’s in part why I had a stroke at 52. Why I had shingles at 30. I’ve tried meditating, counting, breathing exercises, nope, not gonna happen, eh. Just give me the prescriptions blood pressure meds and send me on my way. My job passed inspection yesterday with flying colors and I’m still trying to calm down. Even my teddy bear 🧸 is like, “FFS will you get a goddamn boyfriend, or drunk, or something.”
And so what am I doing on my day off? Currently laundry. I got like 5 hours sleep so maybe a nap. If I get up early enough I’ll take a long walk or as long as my left knee will let me. I come back to LA on the 13th to see the neurologist & cardiologist, maybe a musculoskeletal doctor while I’m at it.
I’m looking online at apartments also. Due to all the Las Vega’lenos (Los Angeles-Vegas residents) rents have increased by $300 a month. And because they’re building a casino down the street from me rent in the neighborhood will go up even more just to have visitors vandal and litter in your yard.
I really want to move to Alaska. Maybe Iowa? Being a small country farmer sounds very nice. I want a cow. Two, so she doesn’t get lonely. My only fear is, what happens if I have yet another stroke or heart attack but this one does me in. Who would care for my cows?
MAE 23, MONDAY
(7:09pm)
Heh 😏❄️
MAE 22, SUNDAY
(4:58pm)
Let's go break stuff!!
(4:48pm)
I cut off my hair again. All the blonde is almost out. This time when the grey hair grows in it's staying in.
There's also a casino being built in the neighborhood. That will draw in ugly Las Vegas element as well. Even Red Rock in Summerlin has gotten more sketch since last time I lived here in 2019. Too bad really. I used to like Red Rock a lot.
On the plus side I just learned today Las Vegas has a Wreck Room. It's where you pay for 30 minutes just to smash stuff in a room with a baseball bat. I'm so in need. The stress of Vegas heat, and this inspection at work, creeps following me home, plus I have to get my health card at 9am on a Monday following a night of work...
Hulk smash!
MAE 21, SATURDAY
(11:55pm)
If we all hated Putin as hard as we all hate Amber Heard, the Russian would ask us for permission just to pee.
(3:25pm)
Going back to work early today to change up my work schedule because...
As I mentioned earlier in this month's blog, there's a park nearby where I board. During the day it's a nice dog/running park. But at night it's another park altogether as I suppose most parks are. Early this morning, walking back to my room from work, a motorist pulled over and asked if "that guy is bothering" me. I turned around and sure enough some man, late 50's or 60's, white, lean, tall (like 6'0), glasses, wearing pants & light coat like a windbreaker, and very non-expressive was mere steps behind me. Holy shit. I had seen this man once before on my walk home from work but he disappeared into the park. I live on the same side of the street as the park but always walk on the opposite side of the street when it's dark out. Early this morning I had seen this man for a brief moment again as our paths intersected at the corner before the park. I just assumed he crossed the street and headed into the park as before, but no, had this motorist not pulled over I would have never known that this man was right behind me. The motorist, also a man, a young man in his 30's, made it very clear he was talking about the guy behind me as the guy behind me walked past us. Strangely, the guy behind me didn't say anything as he walked past us. He didn't say, "Good morning, sorry didn't mean to startle you just out for an early morning walk." He said nothing. Just walked past and kept walking. The motorist stayed with me for a minute letting the older man walk ahead for a few blocks at least. The motorist offered me a ride to which I declined of course. Never get in a stranger's car, boys and girls, unless it's a Lyft.😏 A couple minutes later the motorist took off and I kept walking home. I was only about 8 minutes away. I kept a stern eye on the man, now a shadow under street lights, walking ahead of me. Occasionally he would walk in the middle of the street. But would then get back on the sidewalk. He was still walking a few blocks ahead of me when I turned onto my side street. Weird. That motorist might have just saved my life. Or they were working together trying to get me into the motorist's car. Either way...
MAE 20, FRIDAY
(2:53pm)
Current mood:
(2:03pm)
I can't wait until this inspection at work is over so everyone can get off my dick. Three months I've been there, same thing every night, and suddenly I make too much prep? I make what I got yelled at to make. Because in the beginning I said, "I dunno I think that's too much prep" and then I got yelled at for saying so because I was new what did I know? It will get used. So I made what everyone who has been there longer yelled at me to make and NOW suddenly because inspection day is almost here "Oh you made waaayyy too much". Will y'all please make up your minds!
MAE 19, THURSDAY
(5:18am)
Too hot to sleep. How does anyone in the actual fuck live in Vegas? The only reason to get my own place to be able to run the AC 24/7 from May-October like I used to. And cats. Lots and lots of cats! My electric bill in Vegas summer months was about $70 a month. In the winter like $15 a month.
Took a peak at Twitter just now and... 👏👏👏
Because these idiot women always want equality in pay but never in action.
Meanwhile...
Disney be like: "After abuse accusations against Johnny Depp emerged he will never work for Disney again."
Also Disney:
AND ANOTHER THING....
Got this in my inbox. WTF is wrong with you people? You're in town to get married but want to screw up the (supposed) happiest day of your relationship by trying to hook up with someone else? Just how broken are you people? Why get married?! What's wrong with you!
MAE 18, WEDNESDAY
(5:15pm)
Here's my problem with comments like this, you make women sound stupid. Women are not stupid. Women are not the weak, feeble, mindless creatures you make women out to be. "He has more physicality and money." -- AND?! If a woman hits a man she should be held accountable EXACTLY THE SAME as if he hit her. I love how these idiot women always want equality in pay but never in action.
(3:24pm)
Welp, after waiting in 99 degree heat with the sun pounding down on me FOR AN HOUR after the first bus didn't even show, the app doesn't work, and when the bus finally did show up it just rolled on by and didn't stop at the stop. Plus they charged me twice. And lyft wants $30 into chinatown. I hate this fucking city. I just hate it. Las Vegas can FUCK ALL THE WAY OFF.
(1:13pm)
Preach, Preacher!
(11:07am)
I was in an upstairs room but moved to a downstairs room which is better for my knee. Additionally the room is cheaper. I'm off to Chinatown today to buy one of those thin paper parasols. May-October is horrible in Vegas past 6am. I need that parasol. It's triple digits outside, and while I will never for the life of me understand why previous tenants in both rooms I've now rented here closed the vents thus shutting off the flow of air conditioning, I have grown more comfortable renting rooms than committing to a place of my own. Truth is, I don't want my own place. I don't want to live alone in this miserable sand trap. (sigh) And so... I joined thee date site. Yes, that one.
I swipe. And swipe. And have already begin corresponding with a fellow who has an aol email address. I wonder which chat rooms he used to go into. I suppose we shall find out soon enough. The job interview yesterday was a let down. I'm not taking the job unfortunately. And the fish place I was so excited to eat at was equally bland. Turns out I've eaten there before which explains why it was so unmemorable. The wine has no taste. All is ash. Metaphorically speaking. Or is it?
There's a park by the house where I board. During the day it's a pretty little park where people picnic, play with their dogs, play basketball, lots of trees, and run the trail, but at night it's something else entirely. At night the park is ominous. Vacant of all life. The trees cast weird shadows. I walk past it sometimes at night. Past the hidden figures lurking in the dark. Past the one white car that always parks on the side of the road with it's high beams on. And as I past this little park at night I suppose a ufo will hover just over the ridge of a distant mountain, or a man will emerge from the parked white car and slit my throat, or one of the lurking shadows will rush up behind me and expose it's pale twisted and horrid face. The Scream. That's what I imagine it will look like. The Scream. Painted by Edvard Munch.
This is how I see Las Vegas. Every horrible death you can imagine. And this will be the last thing you see before you die, The Scream. Everything will die with you. Funny how affordable misery always is. Health and happiness always seems to cost more than you have.
I miss love.
I'm streaming BYRON. I feel his pain. I am a simpleton. A product of my environment. Deserted empty sand trap. Hellfire and brimstone is where I sit. I feel nothing. It's terrible.
MAE 16, MONDAY
(11:50pm)
Ya know, I just get to a point where I can't help myself.
 |
(5:31pm)
AMERICA: "Is There anyone who knows how low you have to sink to make Mitch McConnell look like a decent human being?"
(3:25pm)
I'm torn. I want to let my hair go grey again. But that means cutting off my long dyed locks (again). I never should have colored it. I regret doing so but at the time I was in LA and no one hires a woman with grey hair in Los Angeles.
I'm doing it. I'm letting it go grey again.
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Summer is here in Vegas. You get tan whether you like it or not. It's going to be triple digits until October. Ugh. Hot sweaty dust bowl. I have an interview tomorrow for a second job.
I actually got asked out to a pool party at Aria today but declined so I can eat lunch at this fish place up the road from me I've been dying to try. You know you're a foodie when. Additionally it's next to a Target so you know I'm stopping there also. Lunch date with myself. Yay!
Work hard. Have cats. That's my life motto.
I'll be back in LA the week of June 13th. Stroke doctors. Neurologist & cardiologist.
I posed an aging question on social media and no one wants to talk about it. We all get old, people. Why not talk about it? I'm talking to you my fellow Gen X'ers. No one admits to old age quite like gen x'ers. Your asses are 29 forever. My question is this: When do you just let yourself be old? What has to happen? Is there an age? An event? Do you just wake up one day and be like... F this. I'm old. That's what happened to my dad. He was really handsome, groomed and quaffed for years until one day in his early 60's he just said fuck it, and literally overnight, no exaggeration, he was an old man.
If you follow my ridiculous blog for the past (holy shit) going on 9 years, then you know 2021 was the year I physically fell apart. I had a stroke, almost two, liver issues, and jaw surgery. Over an inch of my jaw bone on the left side is newly grown grafted bone. It's amazing. The surgery was necessary or the left side of my face would droop down from lack of jaw bone. I had the option of harvesting my own stem cell, using donor stem cell, or just getting the bone graft. The idea of a stranger's DNA in my skull/mouth (yeah I know right?!) weirded me out nonetheless. I got the bone graft and now there's a new bone in my head made by science. (Thanks Allen!) ... Welp, my left knee is almost gone. Old age. Use. The cartilage surrounding my knee is just tore up, crushed, broken. I can no longer squat down and get back up using only my legs. It took 10 minutes getting out of the bathtub. Getting up from the lou is miserable. I can still bend my knee but it hurts like hell. HOWEVER there is a surgical procedure I can get on my knee like what I got in my mouth. Surgeons removed the broken cartilage from my knee and graft new cartilage. And my question to you (especially to you gen x'ers) is: When is enough, enough?
Do we fight and fight and fight to stay 29 forever?
Or can we just be old?
I don't want to use a walker in seven years when I'm (hello!) 60. I really don't. But I also don't want to keep bone grafting new parts of me every time something breaks down. The jaw, yea, that's different. But holy shit. Just like that in 2021 body part after body part just said "fuck you" and quit. And don't even get me started with menopause. Every day I'm questioning what's going on with my vagina.
"You're fine."
"No doctor, there's something very weird going on down there!"
"You're fine."
"You're not hearing me lady!"
"You're fine."
"I think it's growing thumbs or something!"
At what age is it finally accepted to just be old? I mean. Letting my hair go grey was a huge upset to everyone because as one man said to me, "Your grey hair makes me feel old hanging out with you." -- So don't hang out with me. And now he doesn't. He wouldn't even return my text messages "Hi. How you been?" And not just him. Girlfriends too.
My generation is so quick to alienate each other. I've never seen a generation of men use sex as means for companionship and friendship. "If she doesn't fuck me on the first date I don't call her ever again" is something I've heard repeatedly from my generation. What do you people want? You're in your 40's and 50's! Sure, you can declare "Whitesnake forever!" but no one else knows who the fuck you're talking about. Why not be nicer to each other? Because at our age you only celebrate turning 29 ONCE and it already happened over 20 years ago.
Can we just have the occasional honest talks about getting old?
MAE 15, SUNDAY
(6:15pm)
"Here kitty kitty" and "How's the pain tolerance?" are two things not to say to women ANYWHERE at ANY TIME. To answer your question, yes, each other are the best each other will ever get. FFS
I think their adult profile read something like: "White trash couple seeks IQ's in our subtest range of 60-80. Our heroes are David Ray Parker and that one homeless guy on the freeway off-ramp who carries around a blood soaked 2x4. Single women to the front of line." (You have to include to the front of the line to make yourself seem more appealing.) Nope, they don't sound batshit crazy. Not at all.
AND....
(2:52pm)
How I wake up every day darling.
MAE 14, SATURDAY
(6:07pm)
If these posh young lads from England like it, you will too.
Potato is my favorite of course being a Minnesota gal. I could eat potatoes every day for the rest of my life.
(2:45pm)
Back when parents told their kids not to say shut up to each other. 😂
MAE 13, FRIDAY
(9:40pm)
Thank you for making me laugh. You.👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻
(9:16pm)
I’m that old also but goddamn we look good 👍🏻
(3:34pm)
Between money and planes, I rather Ukraine had planes (and everything else they need to defeat Putin's war) but refusing Ukraine aid regardless of how much and with what, I'm talking to you Rand Paul, you lowlife scumbag, actually makes Mitch McConnell look like a... decent... human being. WTF! That's how low you sunk, Rand Paul! You made Mitch McConnell look like a decent human being! Holy shit. That's pretty low, mister.
MAE 12, THURSDAY
(3:15pm)
Part II
CONSERVATIVES: "Minimum wage jobs are for teenagers."
ALSO CONSERVATIVES: "Why doesn't anyone want to go back to work?!"
TEENAGERS:
(9:32am)
Aww☀️
Is this the original?
(3:46am)
My favorite fellas doing Jack Sparrow👏🏻 #justiceforjohnnydepp #mentoo
MAE 11, WEDNESDAY
(11:05pm)
Let Amber Heard be a lesson to all men. Steer clear!
When even her own parents support Johnny Depp, you know the girl is rotten.
As if sequels don't have enough problems.
(7:05pm)
(5:22pm)
CONSERVATIVES: "Minimum wage jobs are for teenagers."
ALSO CONSERVATIVES: "Why doesn't anyone want to go back to work?!"
Huh. Do you want to explain it to them or should I?
(4:22pm)
Oprah Winfrey doing a fluff piece on race vs medical care. I only say "fluff piece" because lets be honest darlings, there isn't a hospital in the country who wouldn't take this black woman's money.
If Oprah wanted to keep it legit she would have said "poor people vs medical care". I would have respected that.
MAE 10, TUESDAY
(8:30pm)
Roller girlz just
(11:38pm)
The fellas are doing the Jack Sparrow👏🏻
MAE 9, MONDAY
(10:55pm)
(8:51pm)
Chewing low sodium sunflower seeds helps me with stress and prevents me from smoking. Yes, 20 plus years after quitting I still crave cigarettes. I enjoyed smoking. It was relaxing. Last October after jaw surgery I wasn't able to have sunflower seeds for four months as bone grafts infused with my jaw bone and hand to g.o.d. I thought I was going to bloody murder someone. The other day for the first time I ran my index finger over my gums where the surgeon filled my gums with bone grafts and I'm impressed, shocked, and completely weireded out with the new bone that grew in my face. I mean you'd swear there were actual roots of teeth in there but that's all just new bone science made. The surgeon ripped those teeth out to drill at my jaw. Next step, getting teeth implants drilled into the new bone replacing the ones the surgeon took out. You know, don't tell me oral surgeons don't have a bit of masochist in them. I mean who chooses to rip teeth out of people's faces for work?! Bless them for it nonetheless. My oral surgeon did a fantastic job.
(6:10pm)
I have a bum knee. My legs were most affected by the stroke. I lost 30% use of my legs but gained 70% back of which I’m completely grateful for. I’m not paralyzed or in a wheelchair thank god.
I wear a knee brace when I exercise to keep my knee in place. Per doctor’s orders I wear pressure socks 8 hours a day to keep circulation in my legs and reduce hypertension which I also take medication for daily. If the building is on fire just drag me out by my hair. Seriously. I can’t run. All this stuff wrapped around my legs as I hobble around and STILL Boss Hogg & Rosco P. Coltrane behind the counter of their Duck Dynasty Las Vegas 7-11 screamed at me to leave my backpack (unsupervised) at the door. Well Sweet Home Alabama fellas, maybe if y’all didn’t weigh 300 pounds each you could actually outrun and catch the 53 year old woman wearing leg brace and weighted socks if she steals something. Sure I guess I could be faking it but don’t you guys carry guns? Everyone carries guns in Las Vegas. You could probably shoot the sunflower seeds out of my hand if you wanted to, Hoss. I mean why work out when you can just murder would-be shoplifters? Christallmighty, Junior. Do I have to teach you everything?!
NOPE. NOT TRUE. While waiting for my divorce case to appear before the judge (all three times for the same goddamn divorce) I heard child support case after case where many husbands were court ordered to pay as little as $12 a month. Child support depends on what the spouse is able to pay after his or her own life costs.
It ain't your grandma's courtroom anymore sweetheart. Judges now hold women equally accountable for the finances of said children. In this day and age, women can work AND have children just like men. Y'all wanted equality. Here the fuck it is. Enjoy, bitches!
Ladies, your body your choice. Choose not to get pregnant if you can't afford kids.
Just saying.
MAE 8, SUNDAY
(6:41pm)
So windy in Vegas right now even the planes be like fuck it.
(5:14pm)
Happy Mother's Day Google mom!
(5:05pm)
Dating goals!
(4:32pm)
Just had the most amazing dream.
I moved into some elderly apartment rental for people 55 and up. They have those out here in Vegas, old folks apartment rental deals at $375 a month for ages 55 and up. This particular elderly rental had a casino in one end of the building. Naturally, it's Vegas. I was in unit 49. It was on the second floor. I went up the escalator, looking quite fabulous I must say, and who was standing outside his door in the unit next to mine? ... Who you ask?... Who?.... WHO? .... Why none other Than David Coverdale!
This is what happens when you say "Whitesnake forever!" You dream about living in an elderly housing unit in Vegas with David Coverdale as your neighbor. Wait a minute.... Where does he live?
MAE 7, SATURDAY
(7:19pm)
"Day people" in restaurants (particularly first shift workers) hate night people, i.e. me. I leave at least an hour before the morning cook walks in. When something isn't cooked or prepped at the beginning of day shift they assume it's because I only care about my crew. Well yes they would be correct in that assumption BUT that's not why something isn't prepped. It didn't get prepped because we are out of said product, pure plain and simple. But do day people (open their eyes) and look to see if we are out of said product first before complaining to everyone all day long? No of course not. Because that would make sense. So in retaliation, because this is what sensible people do apparently, they hide all my prep containers, chef knife, and prep station utensils. Legit throw them wherever and make me look for every single container. Because in their minds this is what it will take to get me to prep (out of stock product) for their shift. It's a fun little game we play.
(3:02pm)
Instead of screaming abut abortion being "reproductive rights" how about common sense basic women's health rights? EXAMPLE: Lets not spray perfume on tampons and toilet paper to make them "scented". It's unhealthy. Knock it off! Lets not make OTC yeast infection cream $30 a treatment. Lets not gouge women's pocketbook every month for 40 years by charging an arm and a leg for sanitary products. Lets not make ibuprofen so goddamn expensive. Because every month for 40 plus years women bear the brunt of costs for our "reproductive rights" as if we have a choice!
And men, unless you're an OBGYN shut up. You don't know. Until you have endured the costs and pains of having "reproductive rights" for 40 plus years, you don't know shit.
MAE 6, FRIDAY
(9:39pm)
Was it something I said?👍🏻
(9:04pm)
👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻
(8:58pm)
Oh my.
I like my men hot. Not the pavement.
MAE 5, THURSDAY
(3:38pm)
🤯
(7:09am)
The kidz are still alright.
(6:54am)
And you thought it was just human males who did this on the dance floor. Nope.
(6:33am)
Ben Deen & Boki. I haven’t been into the kids YouTube’s lately but these are good.
(6:08am)
LOVE IT
MAE 4, WEDNESDAY
(11:31pm)
AND…
(9:54pm)
The top of the blog is where advertising would normally go but I have instead decided to reserve that spot for correcting bitches when they're WRONG. Just like Mae West would have done.
So I'm crossing the street at a crosswalk. I have the right of way. The little walk sign guy is lit across the street. But some angry 40-something white guy driving a truck is screaming at me not to walk because as I'm now halfway across the street the walk sign starts counting down the seconds I have left to get to the other side. And the fact I keep walking pisses this guy off to no end. TO NO END. He's just screaming at me not to walk. Screaming and cussing. I would also like to mention that there was not another car in sight. So I'm like fuck this guy and keep walking. I cross the street, clear to the other side, and the light changed green for Mister angry pants to go, but he's still screaming at the top of his lungs that I shouldn't have crossed the street because the seconds were ticking down, etc., and he continues to scream at me as he turns the corner and drives away. Holy shit. What was he so angry about? That I might have made him 2 seconds late? Additionally he could have turned AT ANY TIME. There wasn't a "no turn on red" sign. He could have turned any time he wanted. Not another car in sight. I'm Asian with a bum left knee and even I could have made that turn ten times over! WTF was his problem? So I flipped him off, got back to my place, ate vanilla yogurt, and watched Rob Schneider's stand-up on Netflix. I didn't know he was half Filipino. Did you?
(10:27am)
Mae the 4th be with you!
MAE 3, TUESDAY
(6:25pm)
You win internet today ma’am.
(10:14am)
We live in a world where it is impossible for young girls to not know where babies come from. Even with absentee parents, every girl knows where babies come from.
Abortion is murder.
That said
I firmly believe every woman should have the right to murder her unborn child… murderer.
PS
Don’t get pregnant. The choice is yours.
MAE 2, MONDAY
(6:52pm)
Read the monthly header sonny boy. Keep up.
How should we start the month of Mae?
Oh
I know
When you're such a horrible human being you actually have to hire a PR team to cover your trial but even they can't help you:
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