JANUARY 31, 2021
(4:50pm)
What color was my hair? That’s a dead giveaway of how old I was.
My natural childhood hair color is a shiny copper brown. I’ve got a few strands of it still left on my head.
In my 20’s-40’s my hair was dyed unnaturally🩸red, or black, or blue back.
In my late 40’s to present my hair is grey.
I used to lie about my age a lot because I could. I’m 52 years old. If I ever dyed my hair again I’d be like everyone else and just perpetually stay 30 years old. 😁
Only difference is, I would actually look 30 years old. I just don’t want to anymore.
(3:44pm)
Officially it is now year of the Ox. My house of love is open for business. Where are my Ox men? If you believe in that kind of thing.
Weren't masks already mandated? But outdoor dining has resumed, right? I'm confused.
Hey guess what's on at 6:30pm on HBO Comedy?
How many Stacee's do we know? I can think of two off the top of my head and they STILL hang out at the Rainbow. 😂 56 years old. Don't worry fellas you will be rockstars one day. Don't stop believing!
JANUARY 30, 2021
(8:35pm)
"You're beautiful, and interesting, and smart, and I just want to spend a little time with you. With just you." -- Ian Miller
My Big Fat Greek Wedding
(sigh) Swoon!
(2:06pm)
It's gorgeous out. Or it would be if some road construction actually got finished before the weekend started. So let me see if I understand this correctly. You ripped up the road on Thursday and Friday, and then left it because there's less traffic over the weekend, but then come Monday you'll start road construction again? I see.
HD skeleton guy got mad when I deleted his email. So he felt the need to be a dick to me and write another shitty email because I'm not interested in him. And it will never dawn on him that's why women aren't interested in him, because he's a dick. That, and (American) men generally stop grooming themselves around 40. Way too young to not care what you look like. You should always care what you look like. It's called having some pride. That's why I like white collar men, they have to care what they look like.
So it was nagging at me all morning. And because it was nagging at me all morning, I checked. Dream Theater did in fact record a guitar piece called Flight Of The Bumblebee. Be that, I don't argue with Ken. One, because he's a professional guitar player. Two, he's rarely ever wrong, and I just have the utmost respect for him. He gets paid gobs of money playing guitar, doing something that he loves, he's in a long time happy 20 year relationship with a woman smart enough to not get married or care about getting married, he's got a beautiful house in Encino, he doesn't drink, smoke, or do drugs, and he's happy. HE'S HAPPY. So my being right about Dream Theater, Flight Of The Bumblebee, really doesn't mean shit. --- But I was right.
Back to work.
(6:10am)
It's not just about me. It's not just about you. It's about everyone. Even the people you don't know. (gasp!) What a concept. "Whaaaat, make the country better for everyone? Even if it doesn't affect me? RUDE!"
I find it interesting when the complainers bitch and moan about the lack of respect regarding one's time and/or money but then don't seek change in leadership. Why? Because they're selfish. They think they're rockstars. Everyone should just automatically bend to their whim and will regardless of who's president. "I'm so amazing!" Yeah no. How about you get off MY lawn.
When you're 25, being a broody selfish prick is pretty much expected. But over the age of 40, it's just sad. Like the 50 year old guy in a goatee with a skeleton on the back of his Harley Davidson, sad. What's your message here, fella? If you ride with me you're going to die? Maybe my idiotic skeleton will fly off my bike and crash into your windshield, causing the driver to lose control of her car, killing her two kids in the backseat? Gotcha. I get that owning an HD is status quo for weekend warriors, but the skeleton? You couldn't just wear one of those Picklehaube helmets instead?
Spent last night messaging with my Hollywood godfather, Ken, for about three hours. FYI, Nuno Bettencourt did Flight Of The Wounded Bumble Bee. So we were both wrong.
JANUARY 29, 2021
(1:46pm)
Nep. Staying in tonight.
Le'sigh.
9:03am)
Are you in the valley? Do you have a kitchen? Do you like okonomiyaki? It's what Boki is eating below. It's a "pancake" with cabbage and whatever you else you want in it i.e. bacon, shrimp, and then fried crispy in a delicious honey bbq like sauce, topped with mayo and more bbq sauce. It's very good when made correctly.
I am not a big fan of soy sauce or worcestershire sauce. I use both very sparingly only to balance overly sweet ingredients. And we all know I hate ketchup. If I eat ketchup it's to cover up something I dislike even more.
Why ketchup? Who not tomato paste? If I grilled you a hotdog scored and basted with tomato paste, mustard, and a little honey, you would never eat ketchup again.
Ketchup is the work of the devil. It even says so in the Bible.
(8:41am)
This. I want everything Boki is eating.
And sake. 🥢🍶
She really does have nice hands.
(7:42am)
In two weeks it's Chinese New Year. Year of the Ox, if you're into that kind of thing. Ox, are those born (say) in 1949 and every twelve years following. Good news for me, I'm romantically compatible with Ox people. In 2021 I expect my house of love to be on fi'ya!
For the first time in a looong time I want to go out tonight. LA is supposed to re-open patio dining today, some bars maybe too? I think Pasadena is already reopen for outdoor dining? I want to go out. Take me out.
Candidate 1: Didn't leave a name. I don't know what to call him.
Lets see what else happens as the day rolls on.
We all know I'll probably end up staying in. Don't want to be making bad decisions just days before meeting the next love of my life. I haven't been with anyone really since 2012. It's time.
Technically the Ox year doesn't start until January 31.
Ox careers: agriculture, manufacturing, pharmacy, mechanics, engineering, draftsmanship, artistry, politics, real estate, interior design, painting, carpentry, or quarry work.
Ok sure. I can romantically work with that.
I mean, if you're into that kind of thing.
JANUARY 28, 2021
(9:16pm)
Watching ROCK OF AGES for like the 10th time. Nostalgia. Memories. Heartache. Good times. Love this movie.
One night TMZ on a fishing expedition called the hotel I was working for and asked if anything “interesting” happened recently.
What they meant was... 🥺
(4:47pm)
Heeeeeyy sexy lady
(Sigh) I’ve been single waaay too long.
(3:17pm)
Whooooo! I got a 6-pack of Tecate and a box of fried chicken. Anyone else get tested today who wants to come over and get all kinds of ghetto?
(11:04am)
Hello. I just received two phone calls and a text that you’re trying to reach me.
“Yes. Good morning. This is (nose swab appointment) we were wondering if we could move your appointment up to 12:00?”
NO. YOU CAN WAIT IN LINE LIKE EVERYBODY EL.... wait, who is this again?
😂
(9:48am)
Aramis is a genius. We know this already.
Still...
Three phone calls. Two hours. (Sigh) It’s 5pm somewhere. 🍸🍸🍸🍸
I need to blow off steam for sure.
JANUARY 27, 2021
(6:17pm)
So I guess punching dogs in the face is all the rage on Snapchat. And Snapchat allows it.
WTF is wrong with people?!
(2:39pm)
It hurts going from $30 an hour to $15 an hour but I don't care. I just want to get back to work. Plus I'll be working around professors, scientists, and doctors. Heyyy. I made it through interview I. Next week I go in person to interview II with the big bosses. I hope I get the job but I'm still looking. I need to work.
Tomorrow is the nose swab and looking at a few apartments.
If I test positive for Covid I will completely lose my shit.
(6:19am)
Bank, buying an umbrella, groceries, shower, zoom interview, apartment hunt...
This is how my days start. Real friends understand the hustle. If you're not going to be supportive then you're just a hindrance. My life has been on hold for a year because no one in this country knows WTF is going on. We're sick and tired. I was all on board doing my part LAST MARCH, 2020. And April, May, June....
Tomorrow it's the same thing, I have to run around in the rain, Covid test, apartment hunt, continue looking for work if I'm not hired today.
Men want fans and admiration. They're out there. Go get 'em. I have no time for men who want, want, want, want, but give nothing in return. And, look, you're not as pretty as you once were. Whereas I still look amazing because I'm made of magic. Next.
JANUARY 26, 2021
(7:22pm)
Girl, I'm hustling my ass off. I have a zoom interview tomorrow for a USC Covid campus ambassador.
I just want to go back to work FFS.
(1:06pm)
I don’t care what you think about this film. Tom Cruise (this movie) makes me laugh.
(9:14am)
It’s only fitting upon the first few days back home I wake up to ROCK OF AGES on HBO.
Same old LA shenanigans. How I missed thee. Boys getting mad I fell asleep after a long arduous day that started at 3am, but no no please be offended I wanted to rest after my painfully long excruciating day. Apparently if we cannot talk right now, tomorrow will never come. Damn that end of the world meteor.
“I’m really beat can we please talk tomorrow?”
2 days later, no reply.
Sooooo that would be a “no” then?
Aaaaah LA men.
A high of 55 degrees? I don’t care I’m still wearing the hat.
And of course after I left Minneapolis a new Covid strain discovered in Minnesota is being reported. I am in quarantine. I have another nose swab test Thursday. This is my third test. Past two were negative for Covid. Positive for bitterness and despair.
Most people I walked by in Minneapolis weren’t wearing face coverings. Even here in LA it’s business as usual with slightly less traffic. I’ve seen maybe a half dozen people wearing face coverings. People are fed up. They’ll try herd immunity at this point. Nobody knows nothing. “Is Pfizer running out of vaccine?” — My guess, nope. They just want more 💰 💴 💵
Apparently a storm is a’brewin’ here. And by “storm” I mean what Minnesotans call Spring. It’s pretty though.
Just outside of LA few days ago.
Seems Newsome opened the state for 50% business? Meh. I’m back in LA. It’s business as usual.
Until the wheels fall off, yah?
😉
JANUARY 23, 2021
(9:24am)
There’s no place like home. There’s no place like home. There’s no place like...
JANUARY 22, 2021
(6:04pm)
Peanut butter and jelly. Don’t hate. It’s good. A million children and Anime Bernie approved.
(9:57am)
(8:06am)
I don’t love eating alone. I hate being with men and still feel like I’m alone. That’s the worst.
(8:00am)
Lots of women hate eating alone. You should have no problem.
(6:47am)
There's a peacefulness about it. When we're all under the same sky. We can't all be under the same roof, especially now, but there's a bond being under the same sky. It's why some people never leave when they should. They'll miss the bond. The memories. But if all you have are memories, then it's time for you to go.
There's nothing left for me in Minnesota.
Some people need to learn there's nothing left for them in Los Angeles. Leave.
I agreed to come back to Minnesota to be home. To feel home again. Only it's not my home. Not anymore. I guess I had to come back to learn it for myself. I don't regret coming back. But it's time to go. My home is with my friends. The people I've grown with, shared with, lived, laughed, and loved with for the past 20 plus years, my friends who are bringing me back to LA. (To where the warm is!)
I spent the first 30 days in MN taking care of a childhood friend. And the last two months recouping my losses for taking care of her. I don't regret doing it, but I've had enough. Time to go home. I leave here tomorrow morning for Los Angeles.
I call myself a simpleton. Everything I care about in life I can count on one hand. Simpleton. But truthfully, I'm not as simple as I think. The true test of how high or low maintenance you really are requires 30 days in Minnesota. Which isn't a bad movie title.
EXAMPLE: Do you require toilet seat coverings in public bathrooms for peace of mind? You'll get none here. Zero.
There are some childhood friends who turned out as wonderful as I knew they would. But like me, they too have moved on. Long ago. Live in the now, right? Absolutely. Now is all that matters.
Aramis has my stuff. I left it with him. He has all my art. I don't think he knows he has all my art. Does he? (Do you?) He's my bank and life insurance beneficiary. That fact will never change.
Chef Cyn and I need to work a food truck together. Midwest & Mexican food.
I like this plan.
(4:13am)
And it’s not even the coldest month of the year that being February.
Nope. Nope. Just. Nope. I’m out.
JANUARY 21, 2020
(7:41am)
I’ve played, and laughed at this clip way too many times this morning. Wanna know what I was like at 15? Watch this...
(6:20am)
Let no good deed go unpunished. I was washing someone's local bar tumbler left in the sink and it broke in my hand. It's like $8, more like $6, bars actually pay around 50 cents to $1 per tumbler per crate though it's more likely the tumbler got swiped from the local bar. Be that, I left a note and said I'd give the house operator $8 for the tumbler and you can pick it up from her. --- I'm waiting for the drama to ensue.
Some people don't fully appreciate my trying to help them not waste money on food (you under 35 crowd, yes I'm talking to you.) It's not that I don't appreciate my job or places willing to hire me, it's that I know my industry. I know it inside and out across the country and half way around the world and back. Unlike Chef K, well, unlike SOUS chef K, she will go out to eat, order a side of avocado and make a ridiculous scene when charged $7 for the avocado. "I know food cost! I'm a chef!" Well, technically you're a sous chef but ooh la la, point being is that if you know the cost of something (including retail and tax) but order it anyway, that's on you. Why you screaming? All's I'm saying is, if you buy three chicken sandwiches from this place, according to my dynamo Asian math, you're paying $60 for three fucking chicken sandwiches before tax and (god forbid) delivery fee. Personally, I'd rather use that $60 for a nice bottle of wine. Way more enjoyment.
No? Still don't get what I'm saying?
JANUARY 20, 2021
(8:04pm)
Yesterday I went on a job interview. Cooking job in the bougie North Loop. Old Minneapolis. The buildings are brick. Think Meat Packing District, New York. It was 12 degrees out and I took 4 buses total to get to the interview and back. Y'all sick of hearing me gripe about it? Too bad. You came here willingly. Minnesota is re-opened at 50% capacity. It's a start and people are hiring. Can't wait for you any longer LA. You took too long.
So I read the menu of the establishment I'm interviewing at and I see a $20 chicken sandwich. It doesn't come with fries or a drink. Just a $20 chicken sandwich. And so I ask the GM at my interview, "How is the $20 chicken sandwich made?" And he says, "S & P, dredge in buttermilk, a little hot spice, grill, a few dips in the fryer. That's it." -- And I must have sound more shocked than I was when I asked, "For $20?" Because the GM replied, "Too little or too much?" And I'm like, "$20 for a chicken sandwich?" And the GM's response to my shock was pure gold. He simply shrugged it off said, "People pay it."
Holy shit.
Idiots will pay $20 for a chicken sandwich.
Holy shit.
I make a rockstar 8 oz. bourbon bacon cheeseburger with grilled mushrooms and onions, topped with avocado, and a side of home cut fries for $12.99, but lets get back to that 7 oz. $20 chicken sandwich with zero fries because my friends who read this dumb ass blog haven't heard me gripe about it enough in the last 24 hours.
Admittedly, I've paid over $20 for a glass of wine. But lets take a few things into consideration. I've paid $27 for a glass of red wine while hanging out with my beloved friends, in gorgeous southern California weather, by the ocean, in a convenient bar among other neighborhood locals, from a bottle of wine by a particular vineyard that grew specific grapes to make this bottle of wine. $27 bougie. Whereas these A-holes will go down to the industrial part of Minneapolis in 6 degrees for a buttermilk dredged chicken sandwich you could make a half dozen more of these at your house for the same price and not catch frostbite. But by all means, pay $20. (Are you stupid?)
Anyone can cook. You already know what you like to eat. It just takes practice.
ANYWAY
"People pay it."
Yes, because people are stupid. Like Ben Deen paying $70 for filet mignon and two bites of lobster tail. Wow did he get ripped off. Perfect customer. There's a difference between bougie and just... getting ripped off. That's my point.
Catching up on some of my movies.
MAN ON A LEDGE
EXTRAORDINARY: THE STAN ROMANEK STORY
and just now finished watching AMERICAN PASTORAL, which was really good.
Oh Southern California... what am I going to do with you?
(1:12pm)
Thank goodness
(9:15am)
It’s not just a California thing, or a Minnesota thing, it’s an American thing. Men think women are pack mules. They want the sturdiest pack mule for a girlfriend. She has to be perfect and do it all, just like advertisements say. And what does he bring to the table? His dick. 🙄 What a rip-off.
Women need to demand more and get theirs up front. But they won’t. Why? Because most women don’t know how to be alone for a month, let alone a year, and will give men whatever they want just to have someone to eat with. And then wonder why they get abused. “I don’t understand why he yells at me all the time and won’t get a job. It just doesn’t make sense.” — It’s a mystery! But at least you have someone to eat with. Now go buy him a truck. 🙄
(6:18am)
Men can get mad all they want. I’m honest about what I’m looking for. Love is all well and good but if you can’t pay the mortgage and keep steaks in the freezer, I don’t want you. I know men like this don’t exist anymore. I’m a 1980’s conservative. I wake up in the morning, shower, do my makeup and hair first thing so I feel good facing the day. Make the bed. Do laundry. Clean the house. Run to the market. It all feels better when you look your best. Somewhere, a bunch of stupid cunts, feminists, decided women can do it all!! We can take care of men, look beautiful, work a full time job, do all the domestic chores, raise children, we can do everything!!! — Yeah no, you bunch of delusional bitches. Feminists are the gateway to men abusing women. Men now expect women to do everything because of feminists. And what do men give us in return? Dick pics. Thanks useless bitches.
(4:21am)
I know Pavarotti was larger than life, may he Rest In Peace, but my guy was always Bocelli. It always sound, to me in my humble opinion, that Bocelli just sang with more heart, and here you can see for yourself why. A duet with his son.
(3:54am)
10 days ago I found this kitty on my neighbor’s porch. I knocked on his door and asked him if this was his kitty cat because it’s too cold for cat’s to be outside. Yesterday it was only 12 degrees out. He said it wasn’t his cat. So I hung out with the kitty, pet her, and asked her to show me where she lives so I could take her home or keep her with me until they came home. But the kitty wasn’t asking for help. No meows or stress. Instead she just looked at me, then flopped down and rolled around, then went under this porch. I tried coaxing her out but she just went deeper under the porch. I think she was left behind by whoever lived in the house because every day I go past that house looking for the kitty and there’s never any signs of life inside the house, but then again I have not seen the kitty since either.
This is what I’m thinking about at 4am.
Does she look pregnant to you?
JANUARY , 19, 2021
(5:07pm)
Johannes Vermeer was a Dutch painter famous for painting Girl With a Pearl Earing, in the 1600's. It's just a joke. Like my face dubbed in the famous painting American Gothic, by Grant Wood, circa 1930.
(sigh) They don't teach art in classrooms anymore do they.
(12:38pm)
I wondered why there are so many beautiful women on their IG page. — Because it’s a gay friendly bar. Awesome!
That time I posed for Johannes Vermeer.
(11:26am)
I have housemates. I don't know who they are. I rent a room in this big house. Everyone has digital locks on their doors, but unfortunately you do share bathrooms.
This morning between 5am-6am two housemates woke up the entire house talking extremely loud on their phones, because they're THAT important dontcha know. Not only were they talking loud, they felt the need to slam every door and every item they could pick up and slam down. They did this for an hour. Two guys of course. Not that women are excluded from talking loud on their phones. Everyone knows Iesha's sister is a ho!
Aaaaand then...
After an hour of riveting phone screams, both guys called out sick from work. One of them made a bowl of (what smelled like) spaghettios. Then both dudes went back to their rooms. I went to my bank appointment at 11am, just got back to the house, and one of the bathroom sinks looks like someone brushed (what I can only imagine were) birds out their hair. There's a traveler's hair brush on the side of the sink, and a ton of dirt and branch bits all over the sink. Lately there's been thick masses of black chia Pet "hair" all over the bathroom floor. EEEeeeeeewwwwww.
And people wonder why I wear a mask and gloves around the house, while constantly sanitizing everything. One girl left blood all over a toilet seat. The same girl I imagine left her used tampons floating in the toilet.
My question is this, how do people not know they're being particularly disgusting?? Or better yet, why don't they care?? HYGIENE, PEOPLE!
Covid? No, I'm worried about hepatitis, all of them. All letters of hepatitis. People are gross.
Just. fucking. gross.
JANUARY 18, 2021
(5:10pm)
Well pa, it’s after 5pm. Best get to bed.
(6:33am)
(6:27am)
The only reason Ted Bundy and Richard Ramirez were/are so popular is because they both looked like men you would have dated. Half our male friends in the 80's and 90's looked like Ramirez. I probably dated half dozen men over the years who looked like Ted Bundy.
FYI don't go to east L.A. to steal cars.
JANUARY 17, 2021
(4:20pm)
(9:28am)
I couldn't care less if 1,200 hunters went missing. They can all go missing. There's nothing sportsmanlike about seeing a peaceful deer grazing in the morning light, and then blasting a hole in it's head. Fuck hunters.
If you're a true hunter, hunt each other. Why not? Well?
(9:08am)
Asian people don’t normally eat rice with chopsticks. We use a rice spoon. If it’s sticky white rice, then maybe. Otherwise we use a rice spoon. I love watching non Asian people use chopsticks to eat fried rice.
(7:35am)
Remember BLOG : AUGUST, 2018 when I was looking for my Spirit Otter?
It’s a sign.
They just re-opened.
And they have Karaoke! 🎤
🦦🦦
Pre pandemic 😷
JANUARY 16, 2021
(2:25pm)
To—tally natural.
(1:53pm)
Because the powers that be think this is pornography.
Apparently all those new tools to protect minors don’t work. 🤦🏻♀️
(5:54am)
I love you guys. From afar. From a... FAR. But still love. Don't touch me!
These are the guys you want to be friends with, but not live with. Unless murder is no longer illegal.
JANUARY 15, 2021
(7:30pm)
Yep alrighty then.
(10:04pm)
Due to anti pornography laws on social media like Facebook, all ASMR accounts are being banned. Apparently people are using ASMR as a way to promote pornography to minors. Additionally hysterical Karens cannot tell the difference between ASMR and porn. — Which would be laughable except they really cannot tell the difference between eating food, and porn.
Huh
I thought Facebook installed new security measures to protect minors?
(6:18am)
Aliens!! 👽
Very loud echo chamber sounds woke me up. WTF? I tried capturing it on my phone but every time I hit the record button it mysteriously stopped. 🤨
Anyone else hear that, Minneapolis?
No?
Meh
Let’s see what the kids are eating.
I don’t follow Hamzy because the way she eats, and what she eats, disgust me. She actually started off like Boki, a pretty Korean girl who liked to eat. But very quickly Hamzy went from pretty Korean girl, to sloppy eat in her pajamas girl with a giant potato chip clip in her hair. And she eats things like plates of baby octopus. Octopi? I get that Asian dudes are into that but, nope.
I’m learning a little bit more on Ben Deen as I watch some of his older clips. He was adopted. One of his parents is Jewish. But now he lives in Korea. Why? And he reads Korean. But his English is perfect because he was raised here. How did he learn to read Korean? Why is he living in Korea. Interesting.
It’s a weird way of relating to other Koreans, but so far this is the only way I’ve been able to, through food.
That said...
The only thing I have to say about this video is, you’re drinking $5 cheap ass wine. No Ben, no. A good slum wine is $2 buck Chuck, which I think is now $3. Got Trader Joe’s in Korea?
AND ANOTHER THING
I have one more thing to say, you got big time ripped off on the surf part. But that also makes you the perfect customer.
One more thing. (Put your pinky down. No one drinks wine that way.)
Never get steak to go. I mean you can, but if you can’t eat it in the restaurant then it’s better to make it at home yourself. Steak, like seafood, is just among those foods that lose flavor and value the longer it rests. And for the price of filet mignon, just saying. Again, you’re the perfect customer.
JANUARY 14, 2021
(6:54pm)
Girrrrrrl 💜
(3:19pm)
Regarding Ben Deen's rant on how people put Japan on a pedestal regarding quality of food and pretty much everything else, it's because, in my opinion, more consideration and pride goes into Japanese businesses, particularly in the food industry. I made an IG post on this very topic. I bought lunch at a convenient convenience store to compare it to lunches sold in convenient convenience stores in Korea. I know we're talking about Japan, but holy shit. There is a HUGE difference. Americans eat crap. Americans sell crap to eat. Which came first, the chocolate caramel shaped chicken, or the bubblegum salt filled egg?
AND ANOTHER THING
Grubhub and all the other food delivery companies totally took advantage of Covid. I mean $38 for dinner, but $27 in taxes and fees, not including the tip. C'mon. Totally took advantage.
(2:50pm)
When I wrote that last part about food inequality I was in a hurry. But y’all know exactly what I’m talking about. Get your grain, fruits, and vegetables from the source. Farmers markets are great anywhere but California and New York. Talk about price gouging. If you think corn on the cob is cheap at the market (50 cents per ear of corn) it’s practically free if you go directly to the farmers. $20 would fill up the back of your family’s station wagon with corn on the cob. Spend two days shucking corn, bag it all up and freeze it for the winter. Approximately 6 months. Take your kids to an apple orchard. Spend the day drinking hot apple cider, pick your own apples, fill up your car, learn how to can (preserve) those apples, you got fillings for pie, apple sauce, or make dried apple snacks, and you can even sell the preserves and apple snacks on the side of you live in a cottage-law state. But the food industry doesn’t tell you those things because the money is in meat. Food channels would rather sell you on the belief that apples are a mere two month seasonal ingredient for stuffing or caramel apples, that also require the purchase of a ham or chicken. 😉
The biggest food rip off in America is the beef industry. I don’t cook it unless someone asks me to, or I get paid to. Honestly, I rather not.
There are meats I refuse to cook. Purely because in doing so is just sloth. Obscene. Like shark, whale, foie gras, fuck you. I realize how hypocritical that is being as how I eat meat, but I have limits. “My hypocrisy only goes so far.”
If you follow me on IG than you know I eat spam. I’m from Minnesota after all, the home of Spam... which I didn’t actually know that until I got yelled at for not knowing that.
I could really go off about food. But instead here’s a picture of me in the snow. I took it about two hours ago.
* I’m wearing a mask because I’m about to enter Home Depot.
(11:42am)
I got stuff to do but I have to comment on this.
Ben Deen in a past youtube, made a video on the healthiest meal he's ever eaten. During this video he comments about the price of healthy meals, his in particular. He goes on to explain that he paid $40 for that salad, here...
For those of us who know the true cost of food, yes, there is an inequality regarding price gouging and who can afford healthy food. Truth is, WE ALL, everyone in America, can afford healthy food. However, most people do not know how, and that is the true secret that the food industry want to keep to themselves. Healthy food, grain, soy, rice, vegetables, fruit, all very inexpensive foods. But most Americans do not know how to cook with those ingredients, or incorporate those ingredients as being the main dish in your meals. Instead, and watch the cooking shows, items like fruits and vegetables are used as side dishes, salsas, sauces, and garnish. Why? Because the money is in meat.
Follow the money.
Parents, take your kids to a non meat farm some time, or an orchard. You'll leave there with a cash cache of food for very little.
(9:13am)
OK I get it now. I've lived in Los Angeles for almost the entire sum of my adult life. I never understood waterproof mascara. If I'm at a pool or the ocean, I obviously don't care how my face looks. Why then waterproof mascara? But now back in Minnesota, I've been outside while it's snowing (and it's snowing out right now FYI) I get waterproof mascara. I get it. When you wear regular mascara while it's snowing out, and just one little snowflake hits your eyelashes, your whole entire mascara job unravels within seconds. SECONDS! BAM! Panda face! And not the cute cuddly panda passively chewing bamboo. You get angry panda face who will prison for life murder you over a day old piece of trash bacon! Ugly.
Why is waterproof mascara so hard to take off though?
(7:53am)
I think I passed a kidney stone last night. Doesn't it hurt? Isn't passing a kidney stone supposed to hurt? I didn't feel a thing. Then again I haven't felt a thing since 2003. The result of marriage I suspect that being the year I got married. Aaand my godfather (Ken) wonders why I haven't gone out on a date since my divorce in 2012 (finalized 2014). I'm too old fashion. Vintage. Outdated. What I seek doesn't exist anymore. But, Ken's my Hollywood godfather, he wants to see me in another relationship, he's kind of insisting on it, plus he's been with his girl for 20 years (not married, I might add) like Aramis who's been with his chick 9+ years (again, not married, I might add) so whatever they have to say regarding relationships, I listen.
Being doomed in love when you're 20 is expected. Being doomed in love when you're 52, not so much. If I were rich, I would just get cats. But that would not do for my Hollywood godfather. He grilled me yet again yesterday as to why I'm still single. "Find me a man then" I say to my Hollywood godfather. My being single is very problematic for my friends. They think it's creepy that I'm alone for so long. And creepier still that I'm content with it. I'm like their 52 year old child who lives above their metaphoric garage.
I got enough on my plate, people. California is making it really hard to come home. If I were driving I'd just come back. And WTF California? Every day your Covid cases keep rising to all time new highs.
Last night I watched LOVE RANCH (2010) with Helen Mirren and Joe Pesci
And
LADIES IN LAVENDER (2004) with Judi Dench, Maggie Smith, and Daniel Bruhl in his first English role according to IMDB.
I picked both movies solely because I love all the actors starring in them. Absolutely loved both movies. I'll watch anything with Daniel Bruhl in it. Same goes for Mads Mikkelsen. Utterly and completely love him too.
AT 52 years of age, a lot of life has already happened. Most of it. I'm tired. I've lived the life of three people. Additionally I married someone who (apparently) hated everything about me. But I stayed married year after year because I had that much respect for marriage. Dumb. He hated my drawing, my love for museums, my haircuts, my knitting, he hated my clothes, my friends, my family (who he never met), he hated my job (that afforded him many girlfriends), he hated that I loved seeing movies in the theater, he hated my music... he literally hated everything about me which would have been useful information prior to our wedding day. But no, he waited until after we were married to criticize (fuck me) everything. We do what we do to keep the peace which only makes it worse, boys and girls. Just get out. Divorce and get out. My regret in marriage isn't that I got married, it's that I gave up my 500 square foot apartment off Fountain and Detroit (Hollywood) for $513 a month. When I moved in it was only $450 a month circa 1994. I was watching OJ Simpson's White Bronco fleeing from police on TV while my cable was being installed.
And that is why, my dear Hollywood godfather, I don't want to date or be in a relationship. I want the person, but men only want what you can do for them. Men want pretty packaging but they couldn't give one fuck about me as a person. Like you said, men want their mothers. And I can't do that. I can't be a guy's mommy. Grow the fuck up. Be a man. That's why I do so many different things to relate to people on a simple singular scale. I cook so I'm on IG to relate to other cooks and chefs, foodies. I love hosting Sunday dinners and holiday get togethers so I join groups of caterers and party planners. I love the outdoors so I join groups who camp and cook outdoors. I knit so occasionally I join knitting groups who patchwork blankets for the homeless and newborn babies. I draw, though not so much anymore, so I go to art openings and join art groups. I piecemeal my life but I'm ok with that. It's more satisfying than any relationship I've ever been in. All those groups have that thing I love, in common. I've yet to date a man who eats fish FFS. Men love what they're into, and so date their fans (a-hem!) like you, godfather. Which is fine. Do your thing. But more and more as the years go on, every time I'm with a man, I just feel lonely. They're not into what I'm into, which makes me feel very lonely. Ever lay in bed with someone and feel completely alone? It's fucking awful!
But...
Being as how you've been un-married and with the same girl for 20 years, if YOU find me someone to date, godfather, I will give it a serious go. If for no other reason than to get you off my goddamn back. 😜
* How do you date in Covid? Zoom?
JANUARY 13, 2021
(4:26pm)
Ladies, find you a man who look at you like how I look at spam & topokki.
JANUARY 12, 2021
(4:29pm)
Oral sex skills be like...
(3:40pm)
25 seconds of snack time “O” face(s).
(6:29am)
Woke up to Barbie coming out. Is anyone surprised? I mean, Ken doesn’t have a dick FFS.
* stay tuned for BWC Ken doll
JANUARY 11, 2021
(7:31pm)
Beth is such a rebel. Double dog dare her to travel 121 miles outside of Los Angeles!
(4:48pm)
Sexing up my future husband like...
(8:59am)
Maybe film a pickup game today. It’s nice out. 27 degrees. It’ll be 37 degrees Wednesday and then drop back down below freezing. Enjoy the good weather dontcha know.
Maybe find a Korean or Japanese market.
(Little facial ‘stache. VIKING!)
JANUARY 10, 2021
(3:07pm)
Los Angelenos can’t travel more than 120 miles from home.
I can’t come home. Y’all can’t leave.
“On a dark desert highway. Cool wind in my hair. Warm smell of colitas rising up through the air...”
(7:23am)
So pretty much the Tuesday crowd from Uncle Clyde’s 99 cent beer night?
Don’t drink beer that’s only 99 cents boys and girls. It’s 99 cents for a reason. Check the date on the beer.
I don’t have a problem with waving the American flag 🇺🇸. Be patriotic to your country. My issue is when you use the flag to make yourself feel superior to others. As if you’re somehow “more American” than everyone else and that in some strange way gives you entitlements.
Lastly, are these people getting paid to be out there? It’s been like 12-19 degrees for the past 5 days. I’m sure other members of their group were like “I can Woo-Trump! from the comforts of central heat, I tell you what.” — And those dudes I have some respect for because they’re smart enough to get out of the cold.
(1:59am)
As ‘Merica as cowboy boots, cigarettes, and Budweiser tee-shirts.
JANUARY 9, 2021
(4:47pm)
I stand corrected. I can’t see a bank rep for 10 days. That’s the earliest appointment available. 10 (fuck me) days.
Hello, Kevin Smith, I’m having the weirdest dream in Minneapolis, Minnesota. I can’t fucking leave. I can’t...
The powers that be are working against me.
It would be ok if the bars were open. Next week Governor. Next week!
Is calling someone “peanut” an insult? 🥺 I like the name “peanut” as a term of endearment. Especially for puppies, babies, people in their teens and 20’s. It’s an old lady right to passage dammit.
AND ANOTHER THING
It’s not censorship when you’re quashing a civil shitstorm.
(1:40pm)
A snowflake landed on my eyeball and for the following 30 seconds I yelled, “I can’t see! I can’t see!” — So to answer your question, no, I’m not used to the snow yet.
(8:05pm)
My life is a comedy of errors. I gotta laugh. Hahahahahaha... ha
Dear Diary,
Last night in bed whilst snuggling with my stuffed Teddy bear, I rolled over, and something inside the comforter caught me by the back of my wrist and cut me. I unzip the comforter and found that a safety pin holding the padding together had come undone and the pin part was sticking out through the comforter.
Then, this morning, while trying to pay for my room, my temporary card expired. I called the 800 bank number but they said they have too many calls right now, call again later, click. The nearest bank from me doesn't open until 9am, but because of Covid you have to make an appointment anyway to see a teller. It takes about 2 to 3 days.
Oh, and my stimulus check landed in my account this morning, but I can't get to it, or any of my money unless I go to an ATM and use a cardless code, because my ATM card expired. I can't order food or even take a Lyft to my bank, I have to walk the mile which is no big deal except it's 12 degrees out.
I'm not even mad. It's just... funny.
This is my life now. 10 day quarantine in LA, can't use my card in Minneapolis.
Good morning!
I'm just waiting for someone with Zelle to wake up now. Holy shit. Didn't I have this exact same day 30 days ago? I think I actually did.
JANUARY 8, 2021
(11:32pm)
Like all the people who cry, “I’m never coming back to this restaurant again!”
Like all the people moving to Canada, but didn’t.
Like all the people who’ve been leaving Los Angeles... for the past 12 years.
I’ve been off Twitter for 6 months or so. Only when I left I didn’t have to announce it first, I just left.
(7:18pm)
BYE FELICIA!
(1:16pm)
2020: Beat that 2021!
Denmark 🇩🇰: Hold my beer
(12:39pm)
Hello, HR BLOCK?
(Click image to enlarge)
🙄
(6:14am)
Woke up to my room being a cozy 47 degrees. Aaahhh.
Thank god that's over. 52 years old. Remember when I lost my shit tuning 30? Crazy. Thank you for the birthday well wishes and chats. I didn't do anything special. I don't anymore. 52 isn't really a big deal. At my age, in my lifetime, lifetimessszzz, I just want to it to be over. I'm tired.
Someone talked sense into the Minnesota Governor and it seems Minnesota is going to re-open restaurants next week to (hopefully) 50% capacity to start. But even that, look, unless you've worked in a restaurant, or have any economic clue, 50% means your business is still losing money every day on rent alone. NO ONE buys a restaurant to operate at 50%. Sure, you expect to take some hits from time to time, just not get the unholy fuck beaten out of you for ten months straight.
It just amazes me how in this day and age, with all the internet, people are still obscenely dense on how food and drink businesses work. Here's a math question for you scholars: Is it economically wiser for a restaurant to run out of food or have too much that will go to waste?
Food trucks, baby. You roll until your food sells out, then pack it up and go home. Roll out again the next day. Which I suspect is what a lot of these restaurants that closed will be doing in 2021 or 2022.
Guess I'll shower. Haven't showered in three days. I suppose it's time.
JANUARY 7, 2020 2021
(7:23am)
That time I told Richard Gere I was a sure thing.
(6:48am)
(6:38am)
Omg can we please flash mob Area 51 to The Go Go’s?
(6:27am)
If I understand Covid, and I think I do, if I’m a carrier, and then quarantine for ten days upon returning to LA, the Minnesota Covid will leave my body, so that I’m well enough to wear a mask, 6 feet social distance, not touch my face, wash my hands, get contactless delivery, on the wise I may (or may not) catch California Covid, but who doesn’t want Cali-Covid? It’s so bougie!
It all makes sense to someone.
(6:18am)
Happy birthday to me! Twitter, you get me the nicest things! 😭
Who’s got a room Los Angeles, I can quarantine in for ten days like ...
The Minnesota snow beat up my suitcase yesterday.
JANUARY 6, 2021
(11:23pm)
(7:03pm)
I’ll come home when Mayor Garcetti says I can.
(6:48pm)
Spent the day in West St Paul. It’s where a lot of Asian restaurants are. I want to spend two years working in an Asian restaurant just to learn how to cook the food.
Back at the Madison House now. Four houses down from my nephew’s house. Got a bunch of compliments on my hair today. Yessir still my natural hair color. When the sun is out my hair looks less chalky.
Another observation, I’ve turned about five shades paler, almost back to my original Minnesota dead skin color. Everyone here looks like a Viking after a while. Skol!
10:27am)
6 days into 2021 and... Kanye West and Jeffree Star. 😏
FFS
(8:29am)
I got the first stimulus. Same bank account. But I wasn’t on SSI with the first stimulus. Who knows. It all makes sense to someone. The only reason I got on SSI is because that’s what the state case worker told me to do after being denied unemployment.
By the way SSI is $221. Apparently that knocks me out of receiving $600. 🤔
It all makes sense to someone.
(7:51am)
Another year older. Another year wiser. I’m 52 tomorrow with all its wisdom. I maintain as I always will, all the wrong people are in power. There should be term limits in every political office. And all who hold an office should be forced to live one year in this day and age on $30,000.
After talking with Cyn yesterday, a chef I worked with around 2008-2010, I’m convinced no one In LA County must want to dine out ever again. Her restaurant alas is one more among the too many that closed its doors for good. The owners spent the last of their money keeping all their employees on payroll even though there has been no service since June. In their last zoom meeting it was announced the owners were closing their doors for good and could no longer keep anyone on payroll. For six months these guys kept everyone on payroll even though the restaurant was closed with the hope the state would re-open. They just couldn’t keep going with no service. 12 years my friend worked for these guys. Family. No more.
It costs more money to keep a full service restaurant in operation for a single day than what patio dining alone brings in - in two weeks.
Here in Minneapolis, the governor is allowing patio dining to resume once more. And for those you who have never been in Minneapolis in January, allow me to explain, the average temperature in Minneapolis in January is between 35-below 0, with currently a foot and a half of snow on the ground... patio dining. 🙄
Grubhub, sure, when I have an extra $27 in taxes and fees for my $38 dinner.
And when I told Cyn how I can’t come home due to the 10 day mandatory quarantine she asked the same question I asked, “What about all the people who drive to OC and Ventura counties? Do they quarantine? Are there cops on freeway county lines waving a finger at motorists?”
But it all makes sense to someone I guess.
The only plus side to all this fucking mess is I got to hang out with my nephew for a couple days. Great kid. Sensible. Smart. Super talented. An artist. Graphic/digital designer.
The only people making money right now are artists. Good.
“Art school? You’ll never make any money as an artist!”
Uh-huh.
Thanks X-BOX, PS, and cell phones. 😏
Tonight I’m going back to a room at the Madison House. I can’t believe it’s only 4 houses down the street. How crazy is that? I mean seriously, what are the odds? What a great kid. You done good, brother.
And
I’m told my niece, is now my nephew. Good for him. If that’s what makes him happy, good for him. Hopefully I’ll get to meet him too sooner than later. I haven’t seen my (now nephew) since 2013’ish.
And
I haven’t given up on my food truck. AUNTIE LESA’s food truck will roll in 2021. I don’t care what I have to do, it will roll. Even if I have to sell my soul to the devil, (sigh) again.
JANUARY 5, 2021
(10:07am)
No one wants Minnesota’rona. Minne’rona. It makes you nice. No one wants to be nice! Yuck! 😷
(9:43am)
Yes I know. It takes a few days to adjust. 2021. Is the new year really any different? Is it? Is it really? Still no help from the federal government, the states are still closed, and we’re still unemployed. Additionally I can’t go home because of a 10 day Los Angeles mandated quarantine. Wh-ere are we supposed to quarantine? Who’s going to pay for our deliveries?
And the joke of “They house homeless people in hotels” wasn’t funny the first time.
“No. We can’t help you. You’re not homeless-homeless. These rooms are for the homeless-homeless. Not for people being being forced to isolate in quarantine because they came home.”
Oh. Um. Ok. That makes TOTAL sense.
There has to be a reason for it all. There has to be. Yes, I’m one of “those people“ who needs a reason. Being distracted to find a reason prevents me from going full blown Jack Torrance.
But I’m getting there...
JANUARY 4, 2021
(6:57am)
Just finished watching THE FAMILY FANG. So good. Directed by Jason Bateman himself who also stars in it. Love that guy.
And
It turns out that my brother's mom is still alive. This woman. Crazy, doesn't even begin to explain it. I haven't seen her since 1989. The last time I heard from her, or rather the last time she obsessively called me (at least 20 times in a row because I wouldn't take her call) was around 1995. This woman. Mommy Dearest, doesn't even begin to explain it.
I'm meeting up with my nephew around 11am. In texting with him yesterday he reminds me of my brother when we were kids. My brother John and I were a lot alike when we were kids. We both loved art. He paints. I draw. We both did art shows. Our friends were (are) siblings. My friends are his friends little brothers and sisters. We listened to the same music. Only our hangouts were different. It's like that in small towns. And now his son, Zak, reminds me of John when we were kids.
I'm in a strange Kevin Smith movie.
AND
Right now I'm streaming (I don't know what news channel) and they're doing a story about Estonia. ESTONIA! in 2003 I married a Swede from, any guesses? Estonia. This, right now, is the second time in my life I heard about Estonia.
WTF is going on today?
AND
Ben Deen did another YOUTUBE video of Unakyu (Unagi) my FAVORITE piece of sushi. I could easily eat 20 pieces of Unagi. Easily. So good. Yes, eel.
(6:28am)
Do you believe in fate? A fortuitous path? I am once more asking myself how did I get here? I was told a lie and 2 1/2 months later I found myself staying across the alley from my eldest nephew whom I haven’t seen since 2013. How wild is that? I mean what are the odds? He’s now 23 or 24. 25? Yesterday while doing laundry at the mat and texting with my brother, he arranged for me to stay with my nephew a few days while figuring out my next step.
Damnit California. I can’t afford to quarantine and isolate for ten days. I might as well hang out here a while longer.
California, my love. We wear masks, we isolate, we quarantine, we stay home, we’re unemployed for months and months, what more can we do?
Escaping Minnesota. Part II. The 30 year reunion. I’m in a bad George Armitage movie, “Minneapolis Blank”. What am I doing here, Martin?
JANUARY 3, 2021
(9:00am)
I had no idea Larry King was still alive.
(8:11am)
Aramis is my Jesus. Ken is my self proclaimed Godfather. “Some day, and that day may never come, I’ll call upon you to do a service for me.”
Will it involve cats? 😻😻😻
(7:04am)
If I were a white girl my eyes would be huge. Giant. I would get so much work.
But I can’t complain. I’m almost 52 and... Goddamn that nose mole. When did that thing start growing in?
(6:34am)
I try never wishing ill on another person. Bad KARMA. The universe works itself out. Everyone feels betrayed. Everyone is out to get theirs. That’s how entitlement works.
Go ahead professor discuss that in one of your virtual class.
If you’re only nice to someone to get a return investment one day, and it never happens, that’s on you. 💯 on you. Be nice because you’re a good person.
(5:38am)
It’s the episode when Samantha has the flu and none of the guys so eager to fuck her will bring her orange juice. Life lesson right there. That’s not TV girls, that’s real life. Creeps have been getting their’s on the run since the dawn of time.
My (non blood related) cousin in CO wanted to have sex with me and when I said “ew” he got offended and told me to fuck off. Not seeing the creepiness of wanting to fuck your cousin. And while I’m not blood related, he did in fact have sex with another cousin who is, or so he says. My cousin didn’t move to CO for work boys and girls, he was exiled. And now he lives in CO with his daughter who attends university there. 🤨
(4:35am)
I'm suffering from cell phone gamer pinky finger. I've been playing June's Journey on my cell phone since last August? And 3 weeks ago I sprained my wrist. Left hand pinky. Right hand wrist. In four days I turn 52. I'm feeling it.
JANUARY 2, 2021
(10:02pm)
Veronica Wang before the car. A year ago.
(9:33pm)
CHEESY PIZZA 🧀🍕 My girl BOKI is among the eaters but I gotta tell you, the fellas in these clips nailed it. I prefer thin crust pizza also but for foodie clips you gotta go with thick crust. I’m into the black rubber gloves also. I gotta pick up a few boxes.
(9:21pm)
CHEESE!!! 🧀🧀 She only eats in her car. Haven’t seen her around much lately.
ALL KOREAN FOOD IS RED AND CHEESE
(7:37pm)
(11:39am)
It’s actually pretty nice out. Got up to 18 degrees. A little vitamin D.
(10:14am)
Nothing special. Just the bank and laundromat. It's 14 degrees out but I need clean clothes. I think everyone in Minnesota pretty much gave up on masks. The only people who wear them now are essential workers i.e. cashiers, law enforcement, etc. and me, although not all the time. If no one's around I don't wear one of course.
I can't quarantine for 10 days upon re-entering LA. Who's going to pay for my hotel stay and delivery costs for 10 days? So I guess I'm forced to stay in Minnesota until someone (somewhere) figures something else out. My brother tells me my 20-something year old nephew lives across the alley from where I'm staying. Small world. I haven't seen my nephew since 2013'ish when my dad was still alive. I doubt we'll visit. Who wants to hang out with their (almost) 52 year old aunt? And besides, we're not supposed to hang out with anyone who isn't a member of the household. Alright, off to the mat.
JANUARY 1, 2021
(6:16pm)
Everyone I know who was going to get a second stimulus payment got theirs already. I did not. They have my bank info. Not sure what up. Don't care. Haven't been able to rely on those a-holes all year. Every "Check the status of your stimulus" link does not work. Hilarious.
Explain to me why tracking snail mail is harder than getting into Fort Knox? If someone knows Mrs Johnson gets her social security check on 15th of every month, guess what, they don't give a single fuck what city her check is in on the 14th at 11am.
account name
account email
account password
first security question
second security question
repeat answer to first security question
repeat answer to second security question
last four digits of your social security number
no such account name exists
check inbox for account name
type in four digit code
Fuck this, lets just stand by Mrs Johnson's mailbox on the 15th.
(5:30pm)
Looks like I'm not getting a stimulus check either.
Meh.
Pick your battles.
(8:47am)
Cheese!! 🧀 🧀🧀
(7:08am)
We have arrived. Happy New Year. 🎆 I was asleep by 10pm. Hopefully you had fun. I live vicariously through you.
Have you met Ben Deen? I wish he did more with his channel. We both love cheese. Isn’t it beautiful when you have something in common with another person? If I had a son I imagine he would look like him. He’s Korean. I’m Korean (kind of). I’m old enough to be his mom.
My year ended in a Twitter debate with Lyft. How about you?
A few evenings ago I called a Lyft. After 20 minutes of no drivers being in the area, Lyft told me to try again later. No problem. Except Lyft held on to my money. They didn’t return the charge. When I considered getting another Lyft a half hour later they were going to recharge me a second time. WTF Lyft? Remember when Lyft were double charging people? You’d call a Lyft, be charged, get the ride. And then two days later you were re-charged a second time for the exact same ride. SO THEN how did Twitter Lyft explain why they held on to a charge for a ride I never received? They said it was just a hold to make sure there was money in my account. 🤨 Um. 🤔 Aside from the fact y’all holding onto money for a ride I never received due to no drivers being in the area, that explanation made zero sense. Why would you randomly hold on to money, with no option to cancel the ride, and then say it was... because... you were just... checking my account? And why would y’all hold on to a “deposit” AFTER a ride I already got and was charged for? 🧐 🤨
After three back and forth Twitter messages I gave up. Pick your battles.
How did my Twitter debate end? Lyft cancelled the charge and put the money back into my account. AND THEN SAID it was my bank holding on to the charge. But if that was true y’all wouldn’t have been able to put the money back into my account. My bank wants to hold on to my money. Not give it to whoever and be like “I know she didn’t buy anything. Just hold on to it for a rainy day.”
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